how this works

A continuous rhyme, updated on a regular basis. Dates seperate different postings. Hope you enjoy.

the spoken wordd

Spaces and traces                                 Dec 29, 2008

Of places and faces

That made us the

Greatest or fated for breaking

And taking or faking what

We wanted that gave us

Fame or a lame sense of

Disorder and refrain from

Risks or causes of pain that drain

The greatest of us

Will fall

No one is too big or too tall or too small

You will

Hit a wall, eventually

And fall

And to those who look at you in

Plain appall

Leave them all,

Leave them and never turn back

Robert Frost couldn’t even anticipate this set of train tracks

That we follow today

The new age way to live and play

To the last day

Live it up, drink it down

But don’t be surprised when you hit the ground

Plain

The plainest of plain

Can drive us insane

Or keep some inside the membrane

Which keeps em’ going

Keeps all of this flowing

Growing and growing

As a beat plays in the sky

A salute to those who died

In the same soil where we thrive

We struggle to stay alive

The biggest of us, struggle

The smallest of us

Can’t hide

Some of us break laws but this is one

Where you must abide

From the start

The finest of cashmere sweaters

Will come apart

No one is too big or too tall or too small

You will

Hit a wall and fall

And to those who look at you in

Plain appall

Leave them all,

Leave them and never turn back

Live it up, drink it down

But don’t be surprised when you hit the ground

And look me in the eye

Tell me that you’ve never told a lie

And that honesty

Isn’t what we all long to be

Isn’t this what made me?

Or is this what will break me?

and take me

To the latest of late

Save the date

It’s gonna come and you better bring a gun

Because it’s gonna get violent

When the biggest of us haven’t won

And suddenly troubles that weren’t there

Are on our backs

They weigh a ton

And there was that one

But he’s done

This was no fun so he threw the towel in

Because he knew he could never win

And now that everyone’s listenin’

He’s lost, hidden, or just gone

the troubles on the list is long only minutes til dawn and all we have

Is this song

The greatest of us

Will fall

No one is too big or too tall or too small

You will

Hit a wall, eventually

And fall

And to those who look at you in

Uncertain appall

Leave them all,

Leave them and never turn back

Robert Frost couldn’t even anticipate this set of train tracks

That we follow today

The new age way to live and play

To the last day

Live it up, drink it down

But don’t be surprised when you hit the ground

Don’t be surprised when all these scattered mounds

Come down

And the trouble that made us will break us

Into pieces

A puzzle that fit together

Made us better

But now is in tethers

And hung from the nearest falling tower

A tower that once held power

But that was before the law

Fell apart

And what we see now

Was fated from the start

And  lines will sever                       Dec 30, 2008

Cut the cord pull the lever

Don’t look back now

Miss em’ more then ever

And what you thought was for the better

Was for the worse

But it’s done

Locked up and

Roll the hearse

Dread the curse                                        Dec 31, 2008

And watch out for the fox

She attracts people in flocks

Puts em’ in a box and

Never comes back

Freezes you in your tracks

A desecreation smile

That goes miles and miles

And takes millions of whiles to

Leave you

It takes over and breaths

For you

And as long as you look for something new

You realize this is what you’ve come to

Desperation and greed

Feeds the seeds of the weeds

That make the best of the best

Bleed

And come undone

Nah

She don’t care you’ve never won

Those foxes, man

They were only here for a time

Or a prize or the glam or this rhyme

To bite

The hands that feed them

But one day

That hand gonna come back and beat them

Free all the people

Caught inside that box

And the shiny coat that choked

The people

Gonna come back and hurt

The fox

Throw the reversal                                    Jan 1, 2009

Father time wasn’t satisfied

All those times she lied

Was the truth

What’s real and what’s fake are

Seperated only by what you choose to keep or

Take

Strands of shelter in the bombs that you make

Are what’s breakin’ me

But I can tell you it ain’t taking me

Cause’ all people see is honesty

That’s what you wanna be

That’s what you are to me but

Now it’s oh nine

I wanna put an end to all these angry rhymes

And time is what saved you

But it’s killin this heart

Knockin’ on the door and it’s back to the start

I wanted a friend

And in the end we tend to

Put salt in the wounds that were

tryin’ to mend

Around the bend there’s sun

But before it a battle unwon

On the ground a loaded gun

And a lost cause

That was shot by the truth

Of the expedient youth who spoke

Wonders

On odds and numbers that

The life that we livin’

Is just the beginning

And if material winnings are

Falsified spittings and magnetizing biddings

For lost tradition

Or a fake expedition that gonna’ end up in the

Sand

With a pad and a crayon and bottle

A letter that was never sent

We got miles to go but damn

The energies spent

All the places we’re going

Nevermind where we went

The times that passed

Toxic fumes from the gas

That leaked from the underpass

The ceiling that fell down

On top of a town that was already slowing down

On the highway of life

You got a couple minutes

Before you’re still alive or finished

Tarnished or trashed

The good times I wish they’d just last

For more than a length of time

I’m tryin’ to mime

But actions aren’t good enough

I need words and rhymes to

Chronologue this place

Every face will be saved in a database

Dug somewhere underground or in the sky

Oh my

He’s headed so high

But then he’s thrown back down

A man screamin’ in his ear

You got so greedy

Couldn’t stop at success and just hold

what was dear

He tried to take it all

The only question is time

How long til’ the sky falls

On top of this open place                              Jan 2, 2009

So big that we refuse to face

The fears

That are keeping us here and we hold

Near to stay away

Smile all the time avoid tears

Never show weakness and display strength

Elaborate at great length

Show everyone you care

Is anyone aware

Of the blank stare your kid gives

When you ask him to ad-lib or do something

That he’s gotta do but never did

So now we’re on this endless path

One direction to go and there’s no looking back

Nothing to seperate fact

From fiction

Always something to track who’s winning

And the bidding starts

Who’s gonna take it all?

Who’s gonna grow up to be big and strong and tall?

Or build the largest wall around

Themselves

And keep everyone inside

Hoard money and live in the same place you hide

Never dare to cross over to the otherside

The rivers too wide the space is too big

And you thought one time that you could dig

Yourself out of anything

Then fate came with his net

Turns out now your sleepin’ in the same place you sweat

You see the tables have turned                              Jan 3, 2008

And relationships are set

So good luck and break a leg

And we hope you don’t fall off the stage

Because if you do

People will laugh

And that smile you’ve had will broken up and smashed

Everyone that in the past you’ve held dear

Are beside themselves with denial

And left out of fear

Are you really that scary?

Or overly taught

It took the money to find out the gift shop can’t be bought

He was caught up in delirium

Spit out like chewed gum

Suddenly resembling that man on the street

A bum

Blankets spun

But I haven’t won

And no matter the results I’m still not done

Cause I could lose one billion times

But I think I’d still be caught up in similar crimes

That go against the law that isn’t for the people

I feel I’m the equal

But was told I’d have to wait for the sequel

So I did, and now it’s come

Felt the beat build but couldn’t find the drum

And so it’s on broken guitar strings

I strum the lost tales of a boy who was promising

But lost the sense of fun

And the million dollar smile only appears

Every once in a while

Cause it’s happiness that keeps us all here

And he knows that it’s some place

Right now just tryin’ to trace

Not only the past

But a future path

And withstand the wrath

From that fox and the hound

Livin’ a life deep underground

Gazing into the sunlight                               Jan 4, 2008

Outward bound

Never saw a lock for the keys I found

But found a trend

Cause in the end my friend

We all need that bend or that curve

Or something absurd

A niche to fall into where you can mouth this

Spoken word

And just let the lips flow

Let your mouth go

Cross out everything you’d ever want to

Double take on the intro

One hundred times

Cause if you’re not careful people will think your blind

Remember to speak the mind

Of the thoughts that bind

The people together that you can’t find

Anymore cause there was that unlocked door

Left open too long

Behind it a man singin’ a happier song

And tell him he’s wrong

But he won’t go away

Those lyrics are here to stay

Silence from the the frigate bay

turns to whistles blowing

Suddenly the beats going and the words are flowing

The power is undescribable, undeniable

The sick words I drop

Hits the floor so hard

Someone grab a mop

I wanna clean up

But the pencils on the paper,  I cant stop

In this zone

I see what’s in front of me

Everything else drones

I can feel the microphone

In my hand

Then it turns to sand

Falls from my hand

Like everything we planned

Come to realize there’s no escaping that man

Or that scam

To one day become legendary

Everything you’ve dreamed of

All the things from up above

Floating around your head

And as you sleep, around your bed

Is that what you still want, or is that thought dead?

Appetites of the beasts unfed

Are lurking

Jump on you and bite you

Eat the rest just to spite you

Ignite you

Travel to the unmarked land

Irony can only define the same old sand

that covers this place

In the middle of the night

The silence holds the power of Muhammed Ali’s fight

Light from the stars illuminates the path

Sound of  the crunch from the feet of the past

The moon shines brightly

But how long can it last?

A meadow and tree tops

Freeze the onlooker

Who’s never been stopped

Let’s go those emotions that have never been dropped

Arrests the vigor that eluded the cops

The breeze is

Whistling in the distance

Singing the memory of an old man’s pittance

The feeling of being alone

Has never felt so close to home

This is what made us

Where the ancestors roamed

And now the image is clear out there

Painted in thick words but you just stare

Nothing can replace the peace

This place, that face

And jaws drop

As they see those tree tops

Step up and feel you’re head pop

Emergency stop

The silence of the night

Remedies the psyzophrenic’s fright

Freezes the mighty

Steals the convict’s bite

I might                                 Jan 5, 2008

Make it there

Depends if I can get out of

The fox’s lair

It’s all unwritten

Doin’ what you feel

No intermission

Plowin’ straight through

Had enough of me I’ve had enough of you

Do what you know

Let it go

Freestyle has to happen

Once in a while

But that face

Isn’t just a time thing

Told it had enough

Poppin’ in on my dreams

She’s a lean mean fiend

Over the hill I see what you mean

I don’t know how it happened

Don’t know why

Don’t know how to tell a lie from a lie

Jumbled up words

Don’t know how to spell

Unspoken returns

The grocery lady learned

that

The young fearns that were

Growin’ outside

Aren’t there anymore

They part of our lives

It’s raining knives

The bravest of the brave are hiding inside

Don’t know how many times she cried

Then she gave him that look

Straight outta’ the book

The look that so many others took

Stranded but you know a way out

Unsure but certain without a doubt

The water fountain that doesn’t have a spout

Is now broken open and

Creatin’ and raisin’ an ocean

Hynotizing delectable potion

Must’ve heard we’re overflowin’

With a dream

But without a plan

Destined for failure

She stuck it to the man

And it broke his heart

Said it so many times but still searching for that new start

That new part

If only someone let him in

If only someone hadn’t thrown in the extra spin

It’s a lose lose now it’s a win win

That bruise is news to me but

Where is the extra skin

And wait just for a second or two

Then he sat there for hours cause’ he had nothing to do

I’m tellin’ you

He was tryin’ to impress her

Not too good under pressure

The lesser of

Two evils stand in the way

Which ones gonna go?

That dog just lost it’s way

And we’d keep it here to stay

But got no time

Now losin’ the rhythm to rhyme

For a dime you coulda’ had it all

Tellin’ you

This shits destined to fall

The tall man never seemed so small

And never shouldn’t of ever

Been a word at all

Weather should’t have bettered               Jan 8, 2009

My team and thrown em’ into

Feathers of the birds who feel from the sky

Flyin’ so high

How could they die?

I guess sometimes things

Don’t work out like they do on the TV and magazines

And big screen dreams are thrown away

Tossed off into another day

Put off to find another way to stay

Inside the ring

Catch the eye of the fox with magical bling

And we wonder why stereotyping has

Compliance

Constantly question science but still search for reliance

Pity defiance and keep  your heart in your back pocket

Just don’t forget to lock it, or stop it

Some people pop pills to get rid of the way this feels

But I just want three square meals

And hope someday I can deal

cause’

Every day I think about why

And what did I do to become this guy

And tie

All this falcity together

Figure out which lines to sever

Determine which people to keep

Right now it’s lookin’ like the cow and the sheep are

My best bet

Cause they don’t sweat when stuff breaks down

They don’t abandon like the fox

and the hound

The hound looked so good back in the day

That was before she learned to swim and floated away

Guess she was afraid for herself to break down

Better to watch it all burn to the ground

I can tell you for sure that’s what she did

Despite many attempts that man wouldn’t budge her an inch

So it’s from a distant bay I sit and stay

And wish for it all to go away

I honestly wish I could run

I have become her prey

It’s not so easy to lay

out in the open

And ever since the song broke down

You been searchin’ around tryin’ to find another clown

That can make you smile

Sure you hadn’t done that in a while

But people fade

I guess and sometimes you just gotta wait and wait

Until

That dog gets out of your head

And you can go a night without sittin’ in bed

And still wonderin’

What went wrong

Fatal attempts to just try and eliminate that song

From your head

And instead you go chasin’

After the fox and the criminal nation

Consternation

I think is what’s the good way to say

What we do on a day to day basis

Some guys just find it easier to bluff

Some of us guys just don’t have as good luck

And we sit and wait for the fox to

Capitalize on her bait

Now I’m sitting at home with the knowledge that it’s too late

I’ve made a lot of mistakes

Can’t take advantage of all these breaks

And it’s frustrating cause’ it leaves you wondering

What you’ll do when the real stakes are high

And maybe you need to succeed to get by

Or to finally break out and feel alive

And strive to be what you’ve always wanted to

Be good attract attention and do what you’ve wanted to do

Which is to be somewhere

Reciting this song

And having people look at you without the notion that you’re wrong

I admit that these words are long

but it’s a mix of a lot of thoguhts

It’s the result of everything that I’ve bought

Or what I’ve been taught

But mostly what I’ve come up with myself

What I’ve discerned from my time sittin’

Up on this shelf

And it’s gettin’ a little dusty up here

I’m here to report that I’m growing a figurative beard

You may think that’s weird but it’s not gross or fake

It’s the kind of thoughts you’re gonna have to take

If you wish to go far and think out of the box

If you wish to escape the sounds of those distance tick tocks

From the clocks down the hall

They’re just ticking away

Counting off the seconds to a whole new day

When you spend your time in disarray

The joke isn’t funny

Anymore

Suddenly you acknowledge all of the closed doors

And the rooms gettin’ dark

Never been a better time for that spark

We all search for one of those

A fresher start

Sometimes we just wanna get apart from the rest

For a while

Find that smile, now it’s spent

You finally realize how many miles miles you went

As life marches on

As the clock ticks on

Toward a fiery dawn

Losin’ this grip

Gettin’ hard to hold on

Let me tell you about that face                    Jan 9, 2009

The same thing I said was a disgrace

But is now hard to place

Or put a finger on

That image I looked at so long

It can’t hold on

Someday it’ll be gone

It’s incredible looking at people changing

It’s a mystery

All of this rearranging

A struggle to be king

A race to find that diamond ring

Better get there cause’ if you don’t get that first swing

No one can describe the sting

The pain that you get when you realize

You’ve no chance

Of winning

All your eggs in a basket

Might as well have been in a casket

At least that would’ve lasted

And as a witness

He just stands by

With that blank look in his eye

And no he’s not fly

Never really was that type of guy

Stuck to the principals of

You and I

Built a mountain out of the sky

Made gold from blue dye

Everytime you try

You fall

But he’s still standin’ there lookin’ bright and tall

Just off to the side

Not to hide but maybe just to abide

Although he was designed to glide

Just when he hits his stride

He slides

Crashes and falls

Then just looks up and stares at them all

And god damn how you’ve changed

Looks like your molecules got rearranged

Call me insane

But this ain’t a game

Don’t start spittin’ that shit like

The lion can’t be tamed

Like can he be mamed?

Startin’ to think this whole thing was framed

And photographed

Put up on the map

Turned into a rap

Sittin’ on Santa’s lap

And look at his face

Try to trace a place that isn’t full of grace

We look for wholesome good

But just what this is seems to be misunderstood

You see we go way back in the day

The bindings

Yeah I guess they’ve frayed

But he’s  a strict believer that people stay the same

Yeah they change

But certain things stay the same

We’re born with certain traits that fate

Can’t destory

But they still get messed up and packaged like a toy

And sent out on the street

Singing a song that resembles the beat

Of the elite

But bein’ like that ain’t so sweet

Isn’t such a feat because

It’s not so concrete

Anyone can be that guy

Anyone can stick their hands up high

And tell a lie

And say what you desire

Doesn’t matter if you’re a liar

Cause’ now we got things that put out that fire

You can be the king who rules

You can be that dude that rocks the school

You can cover up everything that makes you a fool

Just enter the pool

And these days it’s real great

There’s no due date, you can’t be late

And what’s even better

You can’t lose

Do certain things, pay your dues

And all you get is good news

Someone will always put you to good use

you won’t refuse

Cause’ one day you wanna be like them

You wanna be mommy’s gem

A fake friend

That pretends to hem

The issues of the planet

Or people that you’ve dropped

Remember all of those people that you told to stop

And I like the cat walk

I love the way you talk

You the master of song

Can you believe I told you you were wrong?

The sarcastic smile comes every once in a while

Only in style

Don’t wanna get anyone riled

Never thought you’d see words fall from above

Never thought he’d see new born love

The truth was

He never judged

He never thought that the world he knew would budge

But it did

Wrap those letters up in bamboo paper

Cause’ he never thought it all would taper

There’s a boy standin’ up

Looks around

Stares down

Like his head was bound

To the ground

He could never look away

Always said he would stay

But at the same time wanted to get away

But wasn’t sure how he would fare if he strayed

Or if he sprayed crazy words all over the pavement

If he publicized critical statements

Guess what happens when you hold it all in

You go on a binge and you end up on the fringe

And you’re away from the mainstream yet close to it all

Even though you’re close you know you’re not gonna fall

There’s a gravitational path

It’s apparent to see that you’re gonna last

Cause’ when the pull comes it’ll whip you around

Leave you searchin’ for bodies that can’t be found

One night

He stands in front of the mirror

Starin’ into those eyes it couldn’t be clearer

There’s fear

Because he wants to remain near

But he wants to go far

He wants it all

He just don’t wanna fall

And everytime he’s about to jump

He holds it all in

To protect the face

To keep that everlasting grin

The bells are ringing                        Jan 12, 2008

Violins playin’

Lips are movin’ but he can’t understand whats she’s saying

In the corner

Old man prayin’

Prayin’ cause’ he don’t know if we’re on our way out or stayin’

The pipes we’re layin’

Aren’t doin’ much but strayin’

And at this point it’s all improvisation

What they’re sayin’

Isn’t anything but hallucinations

Procrastination didn’t do any good

Maybe leaders thought it would

Thought they should

Rollin’ banks in the hood

Faded tracks in the streets where bulldozers stood

Mark the point of no return

Yellow police tape

The point of no escape

Never let the sinners rehabilitate

Mark em’ up with

Masking tape and

none of those internet escapes

We playin’ this for real

He knows what happens if you go back on the deal

He never meant to steal

But he did, and he’s gone

Makes you realize that life might not last very long

And that’s why there’s this boy

Playin’ this song

Life’s too short to sit and babble on and on

The dashboard where this picture is drawn

Resembles the human populations lawn

Where relationships spawn

Things become concrete

People get in fights and people meet

And it’s hard to retreat from something that you’ve set your mind to

An impossible feat

Kill in the same place you greet

Die in the same place you sleep

Make love in the same place you weep

It’s not so discreet

It’s an overgrown beat

And it’s outta control

Grew so fast it couldn’t pay the toll

The limits became full

And when boundaries don’t exist you can’t stop things that roll

So tell every lost soul

He scans the country on extended parole

There a walls that are keepin’ him in

Lines out of chalk that penetrate the skin

That terrible grin

That poison the fox said was medicine

Cut open the skin

He doesn’t bleed his own blood

And the water he drinks is the source of the flood

Doors he thought would open won’t budge

Cars in reverse but he’s still stuck in the mud

The water he drinks is the source of the flood

And he figures if he might not last that mile

He may as well go out in style

He may as well smile

He may as well try and read the sun dial

But it’s gettin’ dark gettin’ too late

The ice is thin

Where he skates

Maybe it’s just fate

All he sees is the pictures we create

Up for debate but just hopin’ it’s

Not too late

To throw yourself out on the loose

Everyuthing they know they learned on the news

They say apocalypse may come in a few

From what I saw those timetables advanced by a few

Slippery glue

Doesn’t fix anything
he never said it cause’ he thought they knew

He keeps his mouth shut

But just wanted to point out things come in twos

This shit isn’t done

No place to hide

Hopes he’s had his fun

Gun went off and he ‘s ready to run

Don’t get shocked, don’t get stunned

And never give up if you haven’t won

Never stop                              Jan 14, 2008

And I may try to describe her face

But what I’ve misplaced

Is disgrace

And can’t rehabilitate

Not able to return this crate

Unable to replace the slate

Or reel in the bait

Don’t even imagine comin’ in late

If you don’t show up

They never gonna give you another date

All he’s sayin’ is just anticipate

A longer and longer wait

And don’t eliminate

The possibility of losin’ those traits

Or losin’ your means

Everytime he gets goin’ it seems

He’s rollin’ until he gets hit by the spotlight beams

As rivers become streams

The boilin’ kettle’s done as the hot water teems

Over the edge

World’s bustin’ at the seams

He tries to keep goin’ but all he hears as he gets closer

Are louder and louder screams

Everything is comin’ up too fast

Never wanted so many things to last

Never thought so much about the distant past

In fact

Never thought I’d walked such a lengthy path

Until I looked back

And realized the solidiity of the track

Never thought I’d gone so wack

Never thought I’d come up on such a massive crack

And hear so much smack

Comin’ up from behind

I try not to stray too far from the dotted line

Don’t know if you’ve ever read the laws but they rhyme

And if you don’t rhyme back it’s a federal crime

What is sublime?

Everytime he opens his mouth he just mimes

Everytime he wants to yell the thought retreats to the back of a mind

That’s becoming so blind

From the thoughts he held in

Wants to rewind

and wishes he did

Shits so random it’s like a Mad Lib

Girl looks like she belongs in a crib

With a bib

Now guys are callin’ out like they want dibs

Flashback to when we were just kids

Plottin’ out life in a lot smaller grids

Now I’m daydreaming in a classroom full of

College bound kids

And that face won’t go away

He knows it’ll never work but still it stays

And in the wind she’ll sway

Others faded away

You come back a brighter ray

You come back shinin’ like the brightest star

You come back cause’ you won’t let me go far

I look at that bar

It’s set so high

But I’m gonna rep it til’ I die

Determined to stay alive

For those who just ask why?

You confuse the hell out of all those other guys

They just can’t take the surprise

It’s a human trait

No one wants to compromise

Now you look in her eyes

Feelin’ is so bold it could make anyone cry

Feelin’ is so big it couldn’t fit in the sky

But the baskets so small

It couldn’t fit you and I

The window shattered

The whistle sounded all those untold lies

Racin’ in the fast lane

Isn’t the safest thing

But people do it cause they don’t know what it’ll bring

Commit to it cause’ there isn’t another song to sing

They go toward the bell with the loudest ring

And hope that these wings will swing

Far enough to reach the dream

But most of em’ bow out

Lost in a heavy crowd and

Gone without a doubt

Even the heaviest recruits that they tout

Weight out

And take their final bows

If you snooze you lose

For those who cruise will bruise

Fatigue will ooze

Cookin’ many stews

Won’t hide the scent

Man on the loose

A man who just wanted a truce

A familiar element

A man who wanted the deuce          Jan 17,2009

Man on the loose

Man on the run

They forgot the gun

They forgot who won

The people were so stunned

That the package weighed a ton

A hot dog with no bun

Is no good

Don’t they ever think

“Hey I should”

Or “I would”

But that thought is no good

Lonely as he stood

Gazing out at the forbidden wood

Just looking cause’ he could

Just lookin’ cause’ he knew he should

Get a location

Think about that final destination

Consider the blank set of applications

Think about all the suffering nations

And all the approaching implications

He messed up

Wishes he admitted the mistake

But it’s too late

Too heavy of a weight

Missed the date

Lost the bait

Miplaced the trait

For all you anticipate

For all that you can’t rehabilitate

Just wait

No one can escape

Damn it’s scary when it’s too late

Or not too great

When you can’t fill up your plate

When you’ve fallen into the hands of fate

A free fall

Where there are no walls

When you think you’re too small but really too tall

You thought it was a goal then realize you’re the ball

Tiny shops turn into malls

Spiraling staircases providing feelings of appall

Like you didn’t call

And the ideal situation turns into an all out brawl

The thing you can’t anticipate

Fate

When you’re too late

Or missed the date

When you know that you’ll never be great

When everythings curved but you thought it was straight

When shits distorted with

Familiar traits

When you realize things that were set

Were never guranteed at all

When you never realized there were no walls

Suddenly the sky calls

Never thought he’d be in a free fall

There are times where I want to put nature               Jan 22, 2009

On paper

And savor the flavor

Of old dull razors

Stale shocked tasors

Millions of praisers

The heat of the lasers

Burnin’ white coal

The strength of her soul

Burst of the cold

Strength of the bold

Stench of the mold

Knowledge of old

In the end we know our troubles will be told

Rage of the wild

The hypnotic mild

The face of a child

The papers they piled

Questions the style

All of the while

All the cracked tile

Couldn’t be put back together again

My friend we knew this time would come

My foes they stood on the edge of a drum

My heart it sat forgot where it was from

The end of the crumbs

The numbers were summed

And the thoughts that go through my head

The files piled at the end of her bed

Opposites wed

Just like she said

Just like she said

Just like she said

Opposites wed

If you could pinpoint the end of my thumb

Sounding the beats of a drum

Whispering the hymns that we hum

Everything came but they said that it wasn’t or just couldn’t

Come

Tuning the strings of a heart

Singing the songs of a mispoken part

Turning right back

And head to the start

Just break apart

Just what he thought

Everything you’ve feared

Everything holding you here

The source of the pain and the source of the tears

Freckled eyelashes washed away peers

Still the car steers

Formulates nightmares

Sends you into the heat of the haunt

Dangles everything you want

They call him the master of taunt

Yet he has nothing to flaunt

If the sky shattered

If the batter was battered

If the pitter patters

Just splattered

She says she’s flattered

Everything goes different ways

Some of it leaves

Some of it stays

Some of them pray

Some of them say

The way

To end today

To start the play

Or fray

Everything you’ve wanted, just inside the cay

Fingertips are useless

Unless you can reach your goal

Yet sometimes your goal

Is hidden in your soul

Your body feels full

The rage of a bull

The face of a skull

Gravity pulls

And shatters your hull

And searches your soul

Electric wool

Protects the skin

Some say protections

The best medicine

Until you find

There’s nothing to bind

Your kind

To keep you inside your mind

To keep your vision from going blind

Or rewind

Or find what you know

He never felt slow

Always knew he’d grow

Always held on to the flow

Just when you go

Realize you can’t row

Search for the mind in the back of your head

But the head is a bed

In the bed what she said

Couldn’t be put back together again

My friend we knew this time would come

My foes they stood on the edge of a drum

My heart it sat forgot where it was from

The end of the crumbs

The numbers were summed

The beat of the drum

The beat of the drum

The sunshine will come                   Jan 26, 2008

The ocean will hum

Singing the song of the chords that were strummed

People like places

Places with traces

Faces that made us

Infinite dazes and millions of paces

All the way to the top

Drove the car and couldn’t stop

Hundreds of balloons and all of them popped

Life’s filled with photos but all of them cropped

Dirty floor no mop

Superman flopped

Lance Armstrong topped

And it can’t stop

Human instinct in words ends

In rambling blurbs

With misused verbs

And dangerous herbs

Hurt the people standing on the outside

Used to say you never wanna be looking in

All the people on the otherside

Gonna be laughing when you never win

A fish without a fin

Alcohol no gin

Boy with hidden grin

He always kept that face hidden

Always kept the beat from being bitten

Covered the cold in steel mittens

The way to save all of this crimpin’

Is to just stay sittin’

What he decided not to do

Good people finish last

Bein’ good don’t mean fast

Can be hurt without a cast

Boat without a mast

Exactly the author’s craft

Flowin’ river with no raft

Engulfs the pedestrian

Who just wasn’t lookin’ in

Mumblin’ and tumblin’

Grumblin’ and fumblin’

With no sense of time and only

What was troublin’

Only what the money’s in

Only the locked up bin

Haystack and a hidden pin

Come to the man

And tell him your plan

Watch him crumple it up

Throw it in the pan

Fry it and cover it in crayon

Blow away with the fan

Abiding by the ban and kickin’ it with the can

Was never in the text

And for those lookin’ to be best and next

Standin’ up front just to flex

Or undo the impossible complex

Kryptonite hex

For those who were doin’ the good

Doin’ what they should or would

Can’t get outta the hood

The world’s movin’ but he swears he’s still

Where he stood

Just hustlin’ where he could

For those who dream

Of transparent gleam

And what sits outside the seam

Of the isolated beam

Or the water that flows down the

Less traveled stream

Things never ended up like they seemed

Strollin’ down the pavement

Makin’ a statement

But never knowin’ whether you’ll make it

Speedin’ down a highway

My way with low pay

Never saw a slow day

To those who follow in the beamers

And try to trick the batter’s by throwin’ the four seamers

Future leaders

But bias feeders

Make the getaway whenever the rock teeters

To those who do what they feel

Who know they’re for real

Taught they’re the real deal

When livin’ ain’t so

When space is empty

No flow

The button says no go

But you still always thought you could always make that throw

The decisions in the moment

He takes a bow

Hopes that he don’t blow it

From the start             Jan 28, 2009

We and he knew things would fall apart

Only question was the damage to the heart

Sad melody playin’ on the hypnotic harp

Changes to mysterious karp

Swimmin’ in the oceans with the infinite charts

The parts turn tart

Supermarkets turn to minimarts

Psychodelic beat

Evolutionary feat

Where night and dark meet

Chancellor wets his bed sheets

Sad man hesitant to greet

The elite

Who end up takin’ the seat

Blowin’ the treat

Where the chains are frayed

The pathway where angels once played

And life was made

Wine turns to Kool-Aid

Greatness fades

Sunlight can’t make it through the shades

A man just wades

Deeper and deeper

Hill grows steeper and steeper

Ignores the constant signal of the beeper

For all you can’t teach

For all that you don’t know

For all that won’t make it

For all you don’t know

Achievements will fade

Buildings will turn to blaze

Epochs will trade

Moments won’t make the grade

Disappointments may outwit the sage

Keep all the hopes locked up in a cage

Cause’ things will fall apart

When shit happens

Just regroup

Restart

Everything I’ve ever known

All the things set in stone

Overblown

Major tone

Someone grab the telephone

Set off by the metronome

Words just drone

Onyx foam

Keepin’ the dog from the bone

Tryin’ to keep shit together

Tryin’ not to undo the sweater

Or take apart the feather

Better the weather

Recover lost treasure

Then it comes to me

Like an epiphany

That’s been sittin’ infinitely

On my tongue

An endless muted beat from an invisible drum

A tune that everyone always hums

But is only heard when the time comes

A thing

That only penetrates dreams

And turns on the losin’ teams

Completes screams

Provides extra power for the high voltage beams

Makes the toughest of us squeem

And lean

Or turn around

See things upside down

Finally uncover the underground

What was lost is found

What you had now in another town

Flipped around

Things are lost

But at the same time gained

Things are rearranged

Just when you want them to stay the same

Not everyone’s destined for fame

Everyone will feel the pain

Of the picturesque changing frames

Makes the greatest of people lame

Can’t be tamed

Floor drops from underneath

He just sucks it up and grits his teeth

Fallin’ free

To infinity

An unknown destiny

Feel your heart pound

Pathway switches as you turn around

And I hear them coming

I see the drummer drumming

I can hear the guitar player strumming

The battles keep on coming

Often he finds himself running

The light it is stunning

The light it is stunning

You thought you’re in control             Feb 3,2009

Now they’ve got your soul

Power at their hands

Grabbed the horns of a bull

Escaping the toll

And freeing what’s full

Puts you in a hole

With the monster and the mole

With the living and the skull

Push comes to pull

Iron turns to wool

The valid is now null

Food’s disappearing from the bowl

Everything I’d thought I’d known

Everything solid turns to foam

The lady’s voice now a distant groan

The sounds of delight a fed up moan

Mother’s voice with an urgent tone

Come back home, come back home

The girl she turns

Only hears drones

Never picks up her telephone

Never bothers with the comb

That could straighten up the broken bones

The broken bones, the metronome

The beats are off

One four one

Added emphasis to the silent gun

Pillow hits and it weighs a ton

The harder he tried the less he won

Some people stick to the heart

From the start

Some people

You just can’t break apart

Never stop pushing that empty cart

You care about a girl

But she just wants to be free

But that freedom’s misguided

And it comes down to me

Ecstatic orchestra turns to sad symphony

She just wanted to be free

That’s all she could be

The guitar riffs                Feb 5, 2009

Blowin’ out the head trips

Of all the misfits

Playin’ like the dim wits

Who threw a big fit

When we said they couldn’t mess with

Or even call it quits

Dig out the big pits

Diggin’ his own grave

Playin’ in the fields where the bombs were made

Where the fox betrayed

And the faces were layed

The wind it’s whipping

And the trees they sway

But not today

Or at least not anyway

Not after the man turned all the colors grey

Come this way

All the people callin’

All of them clapping

The radar screen appears and

We see that it’s tracking

All of the foam backing

And the hard padding

That keeps this ship from crashing

And keeps the boat from splashing

Too big

Or too loud

Man comes on stage to a sold out crowd

And damn he’s wowed

Everything he vowed

To the stage

Never thought he’d be breakin’ minimum wage

Pictures fade

But this feelins a craze

Sailin’ on the horizon

The midnight haze

Tires lost the track                 Feb 11, 2009

Ice so thinly glazed

Louder than a fuckin’ parade

Yeah he got payed

Dollar bills fill the majority of the oceans we wade

And there’s silver lining everywhere

He wants to take it all

Gold plating saving everything

No one can fall

Government takes up the hall

The president’s havin’ a ball

Let the chips end up where the fall

Mother’s appall

Fifty times she picked up the phone

But never called

Wall to wall

Thinking

Don’t look at the world sinking

But read the fine printing

Ignore the kid’s wincing

They’re not so convincing

Try to avoid this thing

And guess what he’s bringing

Daggers just pinning

The blood is thinning

And just who’s winning?

We don’t know

Sometimes you gotta’ go with the flow

Dance with Jim Crow

And forget what you know

The children they grow

But the adult’s they’re slow

Think they’re so pro

Think they so flow

Whoa

And stop right there

Turn around to find the emptiest of stares

Comin’ from a bear

Who was locked up in a cage

Locked up for admitting the battles he’s waged

But he ain’t fighting anymore

Sharp teeth and all he messed up the door

And cut out the floor

You can’t move

Shit goes through your brain, danger ensues

The beast he’s amused

He’s just confused

Strike up a candle and unplug the fuse

And everybody see the world in motion         Feb 15, 2009

Everybody drunk on that magic potion

He want to slow it down like it’s frozen

Break out the camera snappin’ photos of the ocean

Mathematician can’t solve for the quotient

The wind is blowin’ houses down

Elevating the underground

Mom sees you and damn shes proud

Flashbulbs on the cameras so loud

He punches by the pound

Sting of the bee and the world’s unwound

Man got his eyes on that crown

Terrorists on the city and the governor on the town

But the eyes of the bird are deceitful

Machines are the equal

Lookin’ for the sequel

Burying a man alive

Killin’ where we thrive

And strive to stay alive

Take a hit in stride

River so wide

Laws by which we abide

But now

Everyone’s breakin’ the truth

Everyone is trickin’ the mystifying sleuth

Tooth fairy lost her tooth

Ticketmaster lost all the tickets in the booth

Monster let loose

All of them screaming

“It’s proof, it’s proof”

Double barrel shotgun

Little prarie kids havin’ fun

The bullets weigh a ton

They’re never done

They haven’t won

The tool box is half empty

But the glass is half full

Get ready for the ride

On the horns of a bull

Inside the head of a skull

The product is null

Feeling’s unbelieveable

Winning’s unretrievable

Lock it up tight in your heart

Take a mental photo and head right back to the start

Preliminaries over but the finals just begun

Holdin’ on is tiring

And you thought you already won

Dancin’ in the shadows          Feb 22, 2009

And kissin’ the stars

And healin’ all the wounds and mending all the scars

Hectic’ cities, and look how far

We’ve come from nothing to this sand bar

Fires burning

The buildings are charred

Tables worn out and

The legs are marred

Forget par

Need a hole in one or I lose my car

The road is empty

The straightaways far

Look at the czar

Look at all the gold

But he still saves pennies in the jar

Preparing to lose everything

Is like holding on to the left side wing

And blocking out what the right could bring

To never feel the icy sting

Scrounging the ground for metal things

Wound up springs and moneyless

Kings

The hot springs refresh

Death

Big eyed man on meth

But he’s got fresh breath

Girl kisses him

Goes under cardiac arrest

The best

Just fell into a mess

That’s less than the rest

Who didn’t even make it through the test

Alarms that don’t ring

Don’t mean anything

Bombs that don’t explode

Go into overload

The humble abode

Erodes

The military froze

Raindrops stand still

Motion just keeps coastin’

But only by will

Woodwinds playing

An endless trill

Players got skill

But he couldn’t run the drill

Scouts didn’t get their fill

Made up almost to the top of the hill

Then he ran out of ink for the quill

He couldn’t write the end

So he couldn’t pay the bill

So now he’s hooked on that pill

But the book won’t go away

He just needs one more second

Of that fateful day

To erase the pain away

The words, there they lay

Midsentence on the last page on that character’s final day

There isn’t text left on the typewriter

There isn’t knowledge enough to decipher

Thrown in jail as a full lifer

It can’t be

That kid was reading mail in a diaper

That could could pay the pied piper

A full lifer

He was makin’ dreams happen

When he was just seventeen

He was makin’ the planet more green

At the age of nineteen

He was solving world hunger

Twenty seven married and havin’ his first daughter

Thirty

He became an author

Pulitzer prize with the first book he had to offer

Then he went off to

Europe to meet with the president and discuss the law for

Changing things and changing times

Right in front of the world he was busting out these big rhymes

He was the first

To mix the lemon with the lime

He was redefining what the world now calls crime

Hit the big forty

When he was still in his prime

But times change

At the latest author exchange

He became deranged

And started writing

The epic of teenage grange

Is what he called it

And he was on the last page

Then he couldn’t do it any more

The lights turned to ovens

And they melted down the door

The skies that were sunny

Started to pour

The pen that used to flow

He returned to the store

Cancelled the book’s tour

Couldn’t handle life anymore

It took a stab

At his core

Then he saw the sun

And it’s lore

And the candle

What’s it for?

He wondered

Opened the locked desk drawer

The manuscripts

He tore

The thing that was supposed to change the world

Suddenly decided was a poor way to end it

And shut the door

And screamed no more

No more, no more

Spent too much time

Wonderin’ what life was for

Finally figured it out

And wrote to page

Five hundred and sixty four

With two and a half words left

The pen fell from his hand

He had vocalized the one thing

The world couldn’t stand

That one reason the scientists have been digging through the sand

It made his head hurt

Snapped like a rubber band

There’s a difference between being free

And reality

There’s a difference between a plane

And the flight of a bee

The plight of the fleas

Nature wasn’t meant to

Be written down on paper

And distributed by the author

Who thought he was doing people a favor

Finally handing out the penultimate flavor

For the world to savor

When you stand up and

Look the night in the eye

And ask it to let you fly

And stare at the sky

And wonder when it’ll all die

You wonder why

All you can do is wonder why

Uncover the ties

What makes you and I

What makes the truth and what defines lies

It’s the sky

It’s the sky

Just wanted to know what it felt like to fly

What happens when the past                      Feb 24, 09

Comes up from behind way too fast?

Something that you’d think would never last

Freezes him in his tracks

Who cares about all the bricks we’ve stacked

That house is smashed

The design would never last

If you didn’t care

Then you wouldn’t be aware

If you weren’t scared

Then you wouldn’t be prepared

Fuckin’ fanfares ain’t fair

Don’t even care about repair

Fuckin’ tires ruined

Speeding and then they’re teared

It’s unbelievable

Just goes to show, be prepared

Just goes to show the best people in your life

Don’t even care

Try to make up for shit all these years.

She don’t even know he shed all those tears.

And the nightmares

Don’t matter where you try to go

The ship just steers

Into storms

Crazy windy noise and psychotic horns

A friendship that was solid is reborn

It’s hard to even mourn

Because certain things are messed up

When she comes back it’s already torn

The breeze is whipping out waves                    March 1, 2009

People are running to find shelter

In the nearest enclaves

The girl starts crying but it only saves

The roads that were never really paved

All of the power that was craved

Swayed

The chemistry wasn’t with me

But I brought this just in case

Didn’t expect the whole city to flee

But I came back to find the whole displaced

Without a trace

All of the ties come out to be a waste

Everything that took the title of grace

In my face

Everything that he hate

Laced, every path he walked

Traced, and all the trouble he

Faced, he’s been disgraced

But just in case, wait

At the same time the fish wants to leave

But take the bait

The suns going down and the street lights are on

It’s late

The ships sinking without the first mate

It wasn’t supposed to happen that way

Guy went crazy, shattered the porcelain plates

Everything cleaned she taints

Message out to all of the fifty states

Message out to sound all the changing rates

Everything he hates, but still she waits

The spokes on the wheel keeps on turning

But something tells me this meeting should be adjourning

Someone told me in school

We should be learning

All he feels is a distant yearning

An uneasy burning

The spokes, they keep on turning

Have you ever looked at a picture

And wished you could just fly there?

Wished you could snap your fingers

And pay your plane fare

And be sitting on that beach and not have to care

And not have to sit there

And take the quiescent stare

Stronger than the grizzly bear

So slow that

It feels like it’s pulling out every hair

On your head, one by one

Then he moves on to your hands, first your thumbs

Til’ your just begging for the gun

Ever throw your life out on your desk?

Say it’s over

I’ve done my best

But I just can’t pass this test

And look in your room

And look at the mess

Then looked at your picture on the wall

Again, the picturesque

The vicious cycle

The dead end quest

People are strange

But maybe that’s cause’ they’re not all the same

And when you think that they won’t change

Things rearrange

And you realize things never changed

Tables turn

Suddenly you learn

Suddenly the fires on, feeling the burn

I turn my back to write

This song

Then it’s gone

I walk down the street just at dawn

Then the lights on

And I’m just a pawn

The kid’s just a fawn

Woke up to find

All the toys were gone

“But I’m just in first grade”

Then “Kid you’re wrong,”

“You’re in eighth and

you got it made”

He was just a fawn

The years fly bye

When you’re flyin’ so high

And they go so slow

When you’re down so low

The river still flows

But you just don’t know

About where you can’t go

He loves the bow

But where’s the arrow?

Where was the pharaoh

To shoot down the sparrow?

Overdrive, five and alive

On the road where I stride

And I strive

When alive

Off the cliff

And I dive

And just hope, I don’t die

And just hope, she don’t lie

In the tower, a spy

In the doorway, a guy

A glint in his eye

Drowning in the tears of an ocean he cried

And I repeat

The dancin’ of the childrens feet

The romancing to the latin beat

The secret retreat

I repeat

The friendly greeters who fail to greet

One hundred pounds of deli meat

The quixotic beat

The years they creep

And I repeat

The growing fleet

The dirty sheets

The used up cleats

The room it reeks

I repeat

The hill is steep

The silent beep

The colossal leap

Mouse in it’s hole not even a peep

The quiet street

The beat

And I repeat

Mysterious delirious                            March 8, 2009

Wonder woman I’m serious

Materialistic curious

Godzilla I’m furious

Manager comes over and tries to hurry us

Go along don’t make a fuss

Opportunity takes a seat

In your face

In your lap

Then disgrace

No map

Lost

Without a trace

Mile splits and trying to keep the pace

Be a shame if it all turns out

To be a waste

Every time you inhale

Distaste,

Distaste and waste and haste

And find your place

Take a seat

feel the beat

move your feet

Go with the flow

White as snow

But not so low

Can you tells someone that they’re not allowed to grow?

Or go

Every blade of grass that he mows

Everything fast that slows

Trying to hold that same pose

And still water the plants

With the hose

And skate on the river that froze

Ice breaks,

Now you’re in with your clothes

Chill moves up from the toes

Warmth stays for a second

Then goes

Wonder how long it’ll stay cold

Shout out, bulletin board

The word “warmth” in bold

Mountains wouldn’t be so high

If we could climb

The fast lane wouldn’t be so fast

If everyone could just stop on a dime

The concept of time

Wouldn’t be such a crime

If it didn’t draw such a fine line

Between what’s fine and what’s mine

And what can rhyme and what’s a crime

And I’m fine, really I’m fine

Girls with you can’t get her off your mind

Right before you                                            March 9, 2009

Realm of uncertainty waiting to destroy you

Or deploy you

Eyes so deep

You’re staring, then asleep

And the feelings they creep

Smile white and smile wide

One of those smiles that that girl can’t hide

Cause’ inside

There’s something to show

Inside she just wanna go

With the flow

On the outside

It’s hard to pretend

If you’re a friend

Or something more just waiting around the bend

I’ve been on the mend

For a while

Then that smile

Hang up the phone and redial

The digits to that smile, that smile

Haven’t seen one like it

In a while, a while

File cabinet and check out the file

The trial

Haven’t met one of these

Poisonous yet mild

A magnetic force

Innocence of a child

Eyes so deep you find yourself walking for miles

Something in that head

Something that’s quiet

But said

Something that she keeps locked in that chest

Under the bed

A secret untaught

The most brilliant of thoughts

Can’t be bought

He sees it in her eyes

Something so deep and so sweet

Yet hidden and disguised

Irresistible attraction

And quiet demise

The scariest trap and most wonderful surprise

Forget love, forget laughter, and lies

Hypnotic smile and those big brown eyes

And the train goes                                    March 10, 2009

Up, down

Turaround sideways

Left right left

Tracks run through the desert haze

Backwards, forwards

Inverted, no worse

Than livin’ in a time warp

Sweet is sweet but tort as tort

Love the feeling

Hate the court

Build the fort, but just don’t make it into a castle

Forget the hassle

Tell me you shoulda’ been there

Tree that’s supposed to have the fruits

Is scary bare

Deep tear

Through the tissues of the Earth

Death goes through rebirth

And for what it’s worth

For the sizzling embers in the onyx hearth

For fragments of dollars torn up and cursed

We don’t take cash here

Only the purse

With no where to go and no where to stay

Crawl up in a hole and hopefully pray

Draw a line between “bad” and “okay”

Watch the flag whistle and fray

Sing like you’re gonna stay

Watch the planet go rolling away

Smiling can catch you by suprise

Those innocent glittering eyes

Goin’ through your head

Beggin’ for supplies

Something she knows

Maximizes wise

One hundred failures in one hundred tries

Something too good, too plentiful, it dies

The inevitable cries

And everythings built for a reason                   March 11, 2009

So why is this castle crumbling down?

To the ground, for that other clown

Two lane road cross the double yellow when

No ones around

Where light can’t be found

Double edged sword and a double decker pound

Built up from the ground

In the sky

Oh my!

Yeah he’s up there so high

And why?

Why is he pullin’ those lies

Time flies when your having fun

Gotta remember sometimes not to jump the gun

When you’re on the run stopping

Isn’t fun, cause’ you’re not done

Light shines through the pupils in your eyes

Criminal mind stunned

Empty fund, paperweight hundred tons

Hundred guns, thousand ones

Trillion billion gazillion

Reasons why I need em’

Millions of millions of millions

Treasons and leading reasons

Harder they punch harder they fall

I’m so tall but I can’t read over the dirty stall

Graffitis an art or maybe not at all

Maybe what they’re writing gets crumpled up

And rolled in a ball

Sudden appall

Louder they speak faster they crawl

Light flashes off then on                               March 23, 2009

Sunrise

The epic dawn

Daffodils in the devils lawn

Board games with no pawns

Life with no fawns

Everything once in place

Gone

New faces drawn

If I was told before that she would’ve won

The game would’ve be done

Would’ve laughed at the thought so long

Would’ve laughed

Light off then on

Flashes

Must remain strong,

Must remain strong

Words that come to mind

So blind

Words that initially rhyme

Turn on a dime,

lose the flow

Need to mime

Words so good they could break a brick wall

Words so right they’d make you fall

If you’d listen at all

If you’d put the fists down

If you quit the brawl

Never thought that bridge would be so small

Never saw a tunnel where I couldn’t crawl

Never stalled

With this mountain to climb

The steepest of rocks and too little time

They told us they were in their prime

Like killing isn’t a crime

Then he has to mime

One day they sky’ll fall and we’ll lose it all

Everything we have won’t be material appall

Or objects too tall

Flying through alleyways straight

Runnin the schedule and never late

She picked a date

She made him wait

He took the bait

He was never late

You were never hung       March 31, 2009

By the drum

Beats goin’ in your head

Everything she said

Anger piles up in anguish

Inside you, rewinds you

So much that you can’t see through

Your eyes anymore

And can’t think in your head

All the words are written on the

Sheets of your bed

Everything alive goes dead

Flowers go unbred

Poisons turn to meds

Softest lotions turn to lead

No one put the yeast in the bread

So the Earth never rose

Human error lined up with time I suppose

The sky just rose

Earth wind and fire imposed

The muddy windows cleaned off by the hose

Who knows?

What’s up or down anymore

What’s an unlocked or open door

Fire drill hit the floor

Infant broke into the candy store

Thoughts that are burning straight through your core

Reinvented on the newly painted walls

Of the house

Stains on the pretty girls blouse

Are doused

In oil and she toils

Flame, then recoil

Wrapped in tinfoil

In a pot set to boil

And cooked to a crisp

Perfect speech now a lisp

The flat surface it dips

The people, they’re equipped

But still can’t handle it

And now the girl, and now tears

Everything that you never could’ve dreamt in nightmares

Appears

Shit hits the deck

The chill man breaks a sweat

Words of regret

Bounce off her chest

That chest that was “blessed”

Nothing you could guess

A well hidden mess

Covered in makeup and straightened her hair

Lifts you off the ground with that intelligent stare

Soon turns to despair

Lights go off you’re going nowhere

One step forward fall down linoleum stairs

Scowling grimace of a grizzly bear

DNA traced by the tip of your hair

Enter the witches lair

Where Calypso was born and nobody fares

Too well

Witch with a magnetizing spell

Enter but bode farewell

Slow cooked on the embers of a universal Hell

Booked on a flight to where the monsters dwell

Everything solid comes undone

It’s hard to say you’re wrong when you know you should’ve won

It’s hard to give up and stop trying when you care for someone

Feel it unwinding she just jumped the gun

This person is binding, trickery lining,

Let’s have some fun

Now it’s all done

Sunshine through the window frame

Voice calls in pain

Phone ring answers with distinct disdain

Outside it rains

Tears turn to the words on a page

Fears turn to the facts of your age

Stuck in the battles we wage

And we lose

Stages of truth

Keep hearin’ that in time true colors will bleed

He planted the seed

It came out a weed

Whole necklace but just one bead

10,000 words but I’m still not done

The truth hasn’t won

The truth hasn’t won

The fox didn’t steal                                  April 5, 2009

The dog didn’t rhyme

That cat didn’t care cause he didn’t have the time

The cities he walked and the mountains he climbed

Staring at greatness along a transparent line

Waterfalls abound

A city unfed

A mountain untamed

And a fountain that bled

Over the streets, all over the bed

The place where he sat, the place where he fed

Where pastimes become memories

Happiness and sadness wed

Lives that are lost and lives that are gained

The border between light

And going insane

And look at the prarie

The peaceful mundane

Look at the graveyard and the peddler in pain

The sky it creeps closer

The harder it rains

Times of help and times of loss

Times where he stood still to report to his boss

Even when he was gone he stayed in their thoughts

A valley or river no one dared to cross

A flat long pause

In time they say your wounds will be healed

Like rotten fruit that was never peeled

Colors change to keep the unknown concealed

Caught between greatness and an unsteady yield

The violent see and golden fields

The sky remains quiet no matter the feel

In the quiet of night

There’s nothing like fright

Thousands of stars give off shining white light

Everything that used to be loose goes tight

Contemplation melts to ice

What was only supposed to happen once

Comes back twice

Things were lost and things were gained

Those that were deemed insane, constrained

All of the scape goats given the blame

Til’ there was one, and that one put to shame

There was never such a powerful ghost like shame

There was never a heavier battle than disdain

In the calm of a midsummer night

It stood still

Discreetly conformed, ready to kill

The troops jumped from trees, screamed, “Ready to kill”

Shouting away a message

A bittersweet pill

A jagged edged knife                                   April 6, 2009

Shoved down you’re throat

One hundred degrees and a big fur coat

The man could’ve never stayed afloat

Sucked the wind from his sails and deflated the boat

Fate takes a turn and throws you from the sky

A man to a man,

looking eye to eye

And how many times have you passed me by?

White pupil dialect speaking evanescent lies

Counting back days and how many tries

Only took a second for the shit to start to fly

And why is it that when the momentum starts to build

The power fades cause’ it’s been overwilled

Everything given to that bowl that I filled

Lost to the river whose thoughts he had milled

Driven to insanity with the impossible to build

Your faith is killed

I wanna be the best                                  April 8, 2009

So I just gotta get this off my chest

This wet hot mess

And just let me get some rest

From the test

Everythings just  a test

Everyones judging but the judges are just a guess

Don’t wanna be less

Don’t wanna float off to a neverland place

Don’t wanna disgrace this face

This place

Don’t wanna give anyone something they can trace

Wanna protect the base of disgrace

Don’t wanna make it a waste

What is love what is laughter

What are lies

Why are we walking under this specific sky

And why

Why are we making everything so high

Never thought I’d say goodbye

Never wanted to cut the ties

Then it’s all gone

Man you’ve never been so wrong

You’ve never been able to just sit down and write

This song

And make it so long

Cause you’ve gotta say so much

You gotta give it that extra push

Extra touch

Gotta be extra tough

Gotta survive

No matter what you do it don’t matter

If you’re not alive

On this path where we stride

Behind those rocks where we hide

Under this moon that illuminates our lives

And controls the tides

Pulls em’ in then out

Reads the story for you that you knew nothing about

Speaks so loud

Speaks the big bold word

Speaks louder than anything you’ve ever heard

Shouts everything you considered absurd

If you can’t hear em’ just listen to the birds

They come in heards

Sounds whippin’

Up then down

Stirring up a storm til’ you gotta fight not to drown

Speaking the jokes, being the clown

Unwinding everything you thought would stay wound

What is lost is dug up from the ground

And found and bound

Wrapped up and sent to every town

Til’ you can’t be unknown anymore

Everyone sits right outside your front door

What was the score

Everyone wants to know

If they’re better or worse than before

No matter what you say

It comes straight to the core

You break straight through the floor

There’s a war going on

It’s a war

Just because things don’t last forever                     April 19, 2009

Because diamond rings are shattering

Doesn’t mean anything

Staircases are spiraling

And five minute flashes are dangling

Underneath your ear

Everything that you’d ever wanna hear

Is near

Just beneath your ear, just to bring a tear

Everything we fear

Time side stepping, your mind unwrapping

Tingling feelings but we don’t what they’re asking

Never been so soar

Fatigue in the sun because we’re not done

Do we call this war?

When we reach out into the sky and beg for a tour

Beg for more,

And have you ever wondered what made this place

Watched the moon drop below your face

Considered the failure but watched for disgraced

Sidestepping melodic versions of the common pace

There’s nothing more hazy than space

I’ve never been so troubled by a face

Open the entrance to a death sentence

Faces of fun better pay attention

Everything that’s been answered has been questioned

In then out and stopped midsentence

There’s a war going on

What for

Is a question that nature has seemed to ignore

The element that kills a life remains pure

Til’ the end of time

And whatever time’s for

Pushes open the door

To infinity

What I’ve been counting and changing and making

Into something that I wanna see

Falls apart right in front of me

To the violent sea

Have you ever

Watched the moon drop below your face

Considered the failure but watched for disgraced

Sidestepping melodic versions of the common pace

There’s nothing more hazy than space

I’ve never been so troubled by a face

I’ve never questioned so much that’s

Been so lost

And no I’ve never self proclaimed the boss

Keep you’re eye on the ball cause’ I’m about to toss

The keys to a dream and you’ll jump at all costs

The keys to your life and your life could be lost

Sometimes I find myself going insane                              April 20, 2009

Without going blind, remain in the membrane

The sun fades, the light wanes

You’ve been fucked with too much

The relevant turns inane

To much disdain

I fan the people of pain, the sorcerer of calamity and

Havoc rips the main

Jugular to the body that embodies all of the veins

Of the world where we collide and survive trying to avoid stains

The party where everybody hangs

Corrupted by the two face nonchalants who

Act lovely only to reveal the night and those fangs

It’s gettin’ old gettin’ sick of bein’ left out in the cold

Everythings weak everything that I thought was bold

Froze, strike a pose

Plant the flower only to drown it with the flaming hose

Everything was supposed to be

Good, like it should be til’ they take off the clothes

And reveal what I suppose

Is supposed to be real

Is supposed to make me think the realistic surreal

The infinite turning wheel

Stops turning, cause’ it feels

Like somethings burning and it is

He can’t deal

Everything was supposed to be good, the skin peels

And reveals a person who doesn’t give a fuck

To how you feel

You argue and you tell em’ that you got there first

Get through a sentence til’ it’s apparent that the worst

Thing possible that could’ve happened in the bullshit situation

It’s been you, that’s who he’s been hatin’

Kick up the turf

Take out the fists, who are you chasin’?

And I can tell you you little man

Who’s time you won’t be wastin’

I don’t need to be hasty and I don’t need to be fakin’

Look me in the eye and tell me who you’re taking

Nah

He would never, he wouldn’t dare

Little kid doesn’t even know how to stare

Too naive to glare, so he sticks it to you

Too naive to send the flare and take a minute or two

This suit isn’t bullet proof

I blame this one on you

To recollect, and what did he do wrong

Keeps rewinding and rewinding the same old wrongs

And the the same old songs

The lyrics get old, people get sick of repeating everything they’ve told

And stood for in bold

I’m all in, who wants to fold?

That same song is just gettin’ old

Leave it to this world and this town                            April 27,2009

I never knew you could be rising down

And at the same time

Tumbling around

Falling straight through the ground

Rise up to the sky

And what you’ve found

Everything makes you free

With nerves abound

And that eclectic sound

Never seen so many frowns

Turned around

Flipped the world upside down

You come right round

What you’ve found

What you’ve plowed

I walked a hundred miles til’ my heart unwound

Everything seems absurd

Everything hyped into letters and numbers

A stumbling herd

The cool cat purrs

The mix tape rewound and refound

The crazy sound spurred

Out from a valley and uncovered from under the Earth

The sky the ground the ocean

The sharks and the birds

Everything passes by my eyes

Turns into a verse

Everything looks like it’s a spoken word

The world turns into a song

Every river that was short is now long

The water flows down the pages of your face

And drips down your nose

Winter comes the drips they froze

Until the warm weather

And they melt with the hose

They go with the flow

How does the beat go?

Yes yes yes

Then no no no

Go go go

If anyone’s got the antidote

Will they please just show

The waves just pound

the wind just blows

Everything seems absurd

Everything hyped into letters and numbers

A stumbling herd

The cool cat purrs

The mix tape rewound and refound

The crazy sound spurred

Out from a valley and uncovered from under the Earth

The sky the ground the ocean

The sharks and the birds

Everything passes by my eyes

Turns into a verse

Everything looks like it’s a spoken word

Everything looks like it’s a common verse

Separated by different motions

And realizations

Crazy motions and cool citations

Divided up into cities and stations

Civilizations

Temporary dwellings for a permanent nation

Hesitation for a second or two

Til’ it turns to evaporation and permanently kills you

The realization

That mountains and special occasions can move

Will rescue you

Because no one that I’ve ever seen is bullet proof

Mechanization of me and you

A body or two

Split in two

A mirror appears in front

And suddenly there appears you

Behind you a motley crew

Things that happened

Shit that flew,

Things that changed and skewed

And shrapnel spewed

If violence is not the answer

Then do we just sit here and wait for cancer

To eat us up or take a body enhancer

To make us buff

Forge a pile of tears cause’ life is rough

Remember when that face was perfect

Without a scuff

And the pavement was brand new

Then it had enough

And the air around us

Opened it’s mouth and ate us up

Walked away and mumbled tough luck

Just like that life is taken away

Surprised to open his eyes every morning

And see another day

The wind picks up

The people around you blow away

And stick by those who stay

Everything around me seems absurd

Everything turns into rhymes and letters

Then words

A beat builds

Notes come in herds

With letters and numbers and words

Everyone in this world turns to a spoken word

I don’t know what you’ve heard                          April 28, 2009

But I know what I hear

People around you that used to be near

Brought down under fear

Succumbed under pools of tears

And crumbled under like collapsing tiers

The water was too strong for the wilting piers

From the sky, somewhere

He peers

From the ocean, somewhere

There is a man that steers

There is a woman who clears the

Words for no one to hear

Secrets treasured under hidden mirrors

Masking tape layed down                 May 2, 2009

Ice skates we used to fly on disowned

Atomic bomb full blown

Explosion of pathways to roam

Walked down in the sand there are so many beaches to comb

So many shells and stones

Every plane they’ve flown

Transcends every single word in every single poem

It’s a matching game with three different clones

I don’t care where it’s at I want to go home

The clouds they fall

Car blows past me and hits a brick wall

Inches from his face it falls

Phone rings your mom calls

Almost died but hold your breath and stall

Can’t tell em’ all

Audience awakens to an all out brawl

You can get away if you just climb that ladder

But it’s so damn tall

Emotions then sleep and then you forget it all

Earth slows legs stumble til’ you need to crawl

Til’ you need to close your eyes and grit your teeth

Contact emergency lights brace yourself for the fall

The pinnacle, the epitome                            May 4, 2009

The valleys crossed and deserts roamed

Climaxing to overdose

A distant ring, a telephone

It seems they’ve crashed the plane I’ve flown

Distant stare and face of stone

Flashing lights and undertones

Bring me home

Bring me home

Man stops you on the street                       May 17, 2009

Do what you’re told

Gettin’ younger as the years grow old

Sun melts around the earth

And slips into the mold

The real estate market is sold

While the unbreakable folds

Her face turns cold

Race track got my back

Til’ the car dries off  the rope gets slack

Office wall plastic plaque

Allies talkin’ smack

Repaved pavement immediately cracks

Bitch tells you to cut the bullshit and learn the facts

But the facts turn wack

Shave with sandpaper and do me a favor

Shuts her mouth and sign a waiver

Waive responsibility as the sky turns grayer

And try to sway her

Try to pay her                      May 24, 2009

With letters from the head

Bullet proof vest and a mind made of lead

What they said

Or where they head

Corrupted by the letters that were burning on the bed

The law is truthful says the Fed

The pain is ruthless for all that have fed

From the hand of the intimidators

Pen on the shed

Filled with the meds

That the lady said would help

But now look

Look he’s dead

The transmitter’s fried

From all the communicated lies

The ghosts slipping by and by

The ladies lookin’ and thinking my oh my

When will the language die

And when will the ground hit the sky?

Planet’s so high, give it a try

Give me a high five

Then land down low

Waves beating sentences on the sand below

Moon rockin’ two and fro’

Sun dipping down into the nighttime so close

To the street

To laying down a flaming beat

The thin paper heat

The dancing feet

The pounding on the ceiling so sweet

So discreet

An everlasting feat

So supreme

If you see what I mean

Have you ever watched the flashes on the slick moving stream?

And have you ever seen the starlight beam?

Or the trees at night so mean

The air so clean

The mountains so pristine

At first glance

Take a chance

No one can ever promise love

For romance

At the best

Take a kiss for a dance

As fate falls from above

To your hands

To the ground of the man’s               May 28, 2009

Worn down palms, hands

That have sewn the fibers of the bands

Who changed everything though romance

And slowed the velocity of turning fans

Who cooled the dance

Who slipped poison in the cans

To all who wanna take a look, your last chance

Before the statue bursts into oblivion

Stood so tall never thought anything woulda’ shaken him

Everyone thinks that the medicines been takin’ and

The puppets are gone fakin’

Earth quakin’ walls breakin’

Everything that you knew you would never know

Exposed in an eerie glow

Armies lined up toe to toe

General pacing to and fro

Straightforward thinking without anywhere to go

Take in a big breath and try not to blow

This opportunity

Your only shot at immunity

The girl is into jewelery

So superficial she got her hands on tom foolery

The ephemeral humility

Turns quickly to pity

Then cycles into something witty

Forgive me

But don’t forget me

Legs are shaky and palms are sweaty

Everything’s in your head like you’re ready

Walkin’ on the balance beam it’s hard to remain steady

Nevertheless the tide remains heady

The people remain purer

They remain optimisitc for those who can cure her

But still she sits by herself

Suffocating underneath the heaping pile of wealth

Quarter past doom                     June 7, 2009

And he’s become immune

Cars flyin’ by with a zoom zoom zoom

Into the crumbs

And into the broom

Try too clean up that which has been inhaled by fumes

Sucked up into the hazard eating vacuums

Shotgun siren and an explosion of plumes

Funhouse with rotatating rooms

Door opens it’s mouth and into it you’ve

Been consumed, driven out with a

Boom, hit with a bang and delivered

To his tomb

Killed without a balk

When the skies spinning from his mattress

You forget how to walk

I’ve become deranged                       June 8, 2009

Times they’ve changed

Every dog I’ve managed becomes manged

Mangled flattened across a desolate plain

For fame I’d drain

Every single flower from every single vein

Just to attain, just to get inside her brain

Lightning flashes rain wanes

Dust blowing in dirties the winow panes

In the doorway I will hang

Til’ I go insane

Watching the clean mane disarrange

Itself, become mingled in the upper shelf

Become enthralled with your public health

Burn out your private wealth

Like pirate’s stealth

Disappearing into a world enthralled in an uncontrolled belch

I speak English, don’t speak Welch

But help

Becoming lost in a maze

Is the craze

But you can just do it in a daze

Accidentally, I end up on stage

Microphone in my hand,

Crowd chanting to play

Melt through the floor, run away

Not because I want to leave

But I could never stay

She reaches out her hand,

In my blurry vision it sways

I want you to buy me another day

Cause’ I can’t do this today

But I know I’ll wake up tomorrow

and try to find another way

To get back in the game though it’s grey

And though we’ve frayed

I can’t help but say

The fox is back in the bay

And the other is deceitful                          June 10, 2009

Swingin’ those hips

N’ attracting swarms of people

Bitchin’ me out

Then retreatful

Back and forth from original to sequel

Low cut shirts can’t even hide the worst

I wish I could see your bubble just burst

But first

Hear an apology for the curse

Maybe just to know that you care who you’ve hurt?

She knows all the people she’s tossed

But to her it doesn’t come at a cost

Who gives a shit if that kid feels lost

Be a damn shame to her if she’s not the boss

I wish you were straight up ugly,

and I wouldn’t lie

If I told you I couldn’t be bothered by another guy

I swear to god, If I could get over it

I’d fly

I’d peace out faster than lightning in the sky

I’d take all of the bowls of emotions

And run em’ dry

And the rampant emotions heaped up

And why?

And why and why and why?

And run em’ dry

If I could get over it I swear to god I’d fly

Swear to god                   June 11, 2009

Swear to the police

Promise to the entire world that I’ll make peace

With myself

And then treat

Everyone else

With the beat

Of a million miled street

A thousand ringing seats

For you to sit in

And recite

everything they say is right

Everybody’s dancing on the red white and blue stripe

The wind picks up the long immobile kite

The waves take the boat that’s never been chewed

And bite into

It’s bright white frame

In the heat of the night

The stars ignite the expressions

of fright

Because tonight

Is the end

We have reached the dead end bend

In the road I can no longer

Fend for all of these people

And then

Tell them where they will send

All of the gracious thank yous

For all of the committed sins

The answers lie in the books

But where are they hidden

And her face is so flat, how

could she go and spit on him?

Story of a girl,                       June 20, 2009

Sweet sixteen

Lighting up her life with kerosene

Between glasses of water and limosines

In her dreams

Took a match to pretty girls on magazines

And in between

Dancing behind illuminated screens

When the boat sailed it steamed

A girl with a smile and a hope and a dream

If you know what I mean

Different than everyone else seemed

When the pot boiled it teemed

And threatened equilibrium in schemes

Streams beamed when they gleamed

Light showing down on the street

The grass where she walked to complete

The day with a beat

Musical notes playing on her teeth

Within that smile, inside those feet

Rhythm so sweet

Intentions to live to a different heat,

Where earth, wind, fire, and

Water meet

And sleep

Running down the path where the angels lay

And stay to watch for another day

Then leave to live another way

So abruptly, to get away

Message too harsh and angry to say

Couldn’t hurt anyone but

Still can’t say you’re

Then hey

Can’t throw those words into play

People don’t know how to catch the cars

That swing a different way

Days drag on, weekend from Hell launches it’s stay

King size bed on top of my head

Lay in it and pray

Knots untied,

Boat astray

Open the door to a fortune swayed

Bustin’ rhymes,                  July 2, 2009

Runnin’ outta time

Close the door and the blinds

And try to avoid the games

That screw with your mind and

Scramble up the lines

Throw everything spiraling to the finest of fine

If he can turn water to wine

And like to grind

The gears of the spine

That supports the wire mine

Rappin’ up records like it’s his job and sign

Every door, swing on every vine

To the end of everything in existence in mind

Fast forward freeze frame rewind

Pause on the water and sink with a whine

Barely a murmur, barely a call

Fell through the trap til’ the trap itself falls

Balls to the wall

Giving everything or nothing at all

Swinging the bat to the telephone to receive

The Call

The whisper from the audience from the wall

The witness of fate of the brawl

Between the worlds and the nations and fuck em’ all

Throw em’ to the ground to the sea to the mall

To buy some new shit, to fall to a crawl

To limp to the ocean, then freeze in appall

With the waves and the sharks and the tower so tall

Shadows and beach, beach and all

Watching for planes in the sky so high

Words rollin’ off the tongue, turn to lies

My oh my,

When did the clouds fall, when did they die?

So many questions, so many whys

So many dead ends and doors to pry

Open to jars of tears

Where the family cries

And hides to shield themselves from the ties

That attach them to the world, they wanna fly

If I could I’d take em’ to where they want,

But I’m just a guy

Take the whole army,

I dare you to try

I look out the window to a whole new house

A whole new game

A whole new mouse

For the cat to chase, for the ball to bounce

For the trees to swing, on all accounts

A murder of life, threw away the opportunity

Man if I could wish for one thing now

It’d be reverisble immunity

Magical jewelery to bring life in

From the foolery

The dreaming, the cruelty

Why did she go and do this to me?

And them, hit the ball of the tee

Looked to the lights and decided to flee

Did you realize, notice

The weight was so heavy?

The burden and caring and no apology

It’s fucked up, and pardon me

Excuse the language but the situation is

Fucked up and shitty

So witty

Intelligent and gritty,

And strong and healthy

Emotionally wealthy with a hint of stealthy

Charismatic presence

In essence,

A pure life spirit sentence

When, hence

The life was taken from present

To past and feasants

Running freely in fields of presents

Gifts to the legends

And I wonder why

Thinking about what composes the sky

I look out the glass, in distant memories

Cries

With sadness and water and tears of laughter and lies

Snowballs, and bus stops

Bugs and flies

Oh my gods changed to oh mys

She was the ballerina,

she always tried

Then left a trail of questions

With aggression

A death sentence, without mention

Slammed on the breaks to an endin’

And an unfinished plan

You fucked a lot of shit up here

So I hope at least you stuck it to the man

Follow the flame               July 8, 2009

The main frame goes insane

Got the inane, in pain

Blowin’ through a frame

Of years sustained

Under the umbrella, and gained

Nothing but a whole lost pocket of change

Changes came

Willed through a game

Of black and white pawns

And melancholy strains

Flavored the same

Colored into my brain

Dyed and dashed and the wind it wanes

The ocean it creeps

Through the cracks the

Water seeps, in through the glass

So we watch it as it leaps

Onto the grass

And it blocks our path

Living out my days inside an hour glass

Time blows by fast

Smacks me in a dash

Gotta find a way to mark out a hash

To retain the staff

Mark out a field

Take out every mother fuckin’ weapon I can wield

Buy everything but tell your mom you stealed

And stealth and wealth and crime

The truth revealed

Ghost appealed

Willing to come back to life

Everyday he marries his infinitely divorced wife

Flying a kite

So you don’t know where it’ll blow

Try as he might

That barrier may never explode

And let him go

The threats imposed,

Caged in rows concealed

To a field and a hoe

And farm this shit

Learn as you go

Reap the benefits of counterculture faith it grows

In your body

In your head and soul

I’ve climbed a hundred steps just to reach that goal

Outside a train churns,

Churns out coal

From the embers of a grandfathers long lost

Pull,

gravitational hull

Protecting the skin

Cause’ I’ve heard before protections

The best medicine

The best healer, the most ill committed sin

Mess up a hundred ghosts

But eventually the ghosts gonna win

Cause’ I look into my yard                   July 13, 2009

And remember the days

Past, and

her ways, waiting time out in an hour glass

I wanna graze, over the memories

Take away the haze

And go back

Midnight gaze

Lights on, all I can say

How did she come to be this way

Sky is grey

Rain pouring down, all night

All day

I am phased and broken

Taken away

From reality, put in a world

To play, wrenches and weapons

So gay,

so gay in two different stays

Ways that make us all cringe but

Remain calm, at bay

Look over to the yard, the sky

And pray

She’s gone,

She’s gone she’s gone

Gap between physical death

Twenty two days long

I wanna play you a song

Play on, play on

Rewrite every wrong

You’re gone

You’re gone, you’re gone, you’re mom

and Dad, so strong

But bent around and torn and

The lights at night they mourn

And broken

We’re broken as we                   July 26, 2009

Spin out of control

Pockets are empty,

Can’t pay the toll

The fee is foiling our soul

Think about the loss

The beauty, that face,

The Goal

Words were written, but they lost the scroll

And time’s standing still

Banging on the walls,

searching for a will

To live

Couldn’t find it,

She never did

Happiness never ever such a fib

Fill in the blanks,

Mad Lib

Guessing and guessing

To uncover the lid

A secret that no one ever knew

Never will, just a kid

That yard, those eyes,

I sit

Cause’ it’s hard to take it

Just a baby, that bib

That wagon, those words, that rock

She did what she did

Life spins out of control

Skids

To stop

Heads

Turn, jaws drop

Out of the woodwork

But then flop

Intricate knot, feelings don’t stop

Fused in their brains by time and a set clock

And broken

Beads of sweat, take the shot                July 26, 2009

Hearts tangled, veins in knots

Got to do everything

Find every way, to beat the clock

Shout of pain

Time stops

I have never witnessed

Shock

But now, people come in flocks

Stepping out of wormholes

Thousands of insane, sticking

Clocks

Timing, waiting

We sit in awe and watch

Living slips away

Dreams around the block

Fade, distant tick tocks

In my head

Because no one can do anything else

But boil in the broth

The soup, the bowl

No one cared to wash

Because they didn’t see the dirt,

Covering the cloth

To our eyes

Blinded,

Turns to a cough

Impeding speech,

Vision, on

Off, on, off

Sliding down the slopes,

Shitty fate that they brought

Mocking faces

Taking starts

The pages, of a book

Wings of a butterfly turned moth

Turned dead

And so they pop

The balloons, they drop

Air is scarce

Breathing’s taught

Taught the control

Hold it in, feelings

Can’t be bought

Sickness

Making us crop

People away,

Til’ there not

There anymore

And the lights at night

And control is lost

Before I sleep at night,                     July 27, 2009

I can’t sleep

Her head, hanging

She’s dead

And gone

Remember,

The last thing she said

She did

The yard, she fed

Torn and broken

Lights at night they mourn

The bed, purple sheets

My head, is gone

The lights, they speed

They’ve sped by

Like her life

Physical remains

Then emotional pain

Feeds the brain

Then shot in the head

Sidestepping through the air                July 31, 2010

The sky

We are floating, flying

So high

You and I, to live

Or to tell a lie

Is the question, a debate

A third eye

To watch me, to support the “whys”

Survival is so dry

The edge so alive

We to experience the drive,

The climb the sentence the strides

“To bes” and bee hives

To lives and sky dives

To life and to live by

Principles unwritten, drives

Us over the line,

The ties, to reality

Rewind, intensify

The zone is around you and I

Wishing, waiting

War comes in and its ours for the taking

It’s done, all of the faking

All of the breaking, the maneuvering, the snaking

I want to dive in, the wreck has been saving

Us from battle, from dating

Pain, holding hands with Satan

Painstaking fields creating

Time warps and ill fated spading

Stabbed, rewritten, skating

On the ice of the world

And the world is for fighting, and living,

and hating

Side spin, top spin, back spin                     Aug 9, 2009

My friend

Dare I say we’ve reached the end

Of this poem, the last road

The last bend, the last trend

For what sits, to attend

When you’ve achieved it all, quick sand

Back to the start to the end

Restart to the injury to mend

Blank pages, stares send

Messages stronger than my words,

My pen, rambles

On a journey, through again

Swords to fend

Off the enemies, so inflexible

I stretch out, bend

Riding on the back of the ocean

My pet, the dolphin

Dive down, the sea, my reflection

The water,

Cool, crisp, refreshing

The sun

Hot, warm, listen

To the wind, it blows by

For a reason, I don’t know why

See a picture, imagine, and fly

Mothafucka I’m so big now I can

Tear down the whole damn sky

Roll it in a postcard, send it to a guy

Make a million dollars for just askin’ “Why?”

And questioning love, life, lies

I hide in the bushes,

Across the way, see spies

Lookin’ at him, paparrazzi

Like flies, like bugs

Pests can die

Who stick to your ass, never say goodbye

Open the door, compartment-

alize, my emotions

Save em’ for another time,

Another rhyme

I can bust out,

Infinite lines, if given time

Make every fuckin’ word in the language

Smooth, fine

Thinned out, a supermodel of a new kind

New era, my brand, scent, blind

To the lines, holding others in

Freedom, crimes

Legalized, chug the Hudson, the Metro, the Klein

Eat up the Rock, in his prime

Not full yet, still kind

Of wicked, nasty, mimed

Out that which can’t be said

I say it,

That which can’t be shown,

Display it,

The invinsible,

Spray it, out on a canvas

Pay it, a visit

List it, under the black list

Lucky if you get a kiss, don’t miss

Me much, we’ll keep in touch

He say it a bunch,

I eat it for lunch

Actions, speak louder

Than words

But you’d be surprised how far these verbs

Take you, they’ve taken me,

Superb, excellent,

Good to have heard

Heard the dogs in,

They listen cause’ the birds

Will fly down and grab you

Be careful, don’t hide, tell the truth

See how far lies and spoofs,

Take him, they eventually blow through the roof

Say goodbye in a poof

End up a spoof

Goodmorning, goodbye

I’ll see you when I’m back from touching the sky

I see you when I get back from lunch                     Aug 11, 2009

We keep in touch

Don’t forget too much

Everybody looks up,

Looks rough, looks tough

The course is building, the beat is killing

Bees are stinging, the life

The body, the goal,

The heart of our whole

World, is contained, within money

I am on parole

Released on account of mold,

Took over the building

Official documents, “Deceased” in bold

I fold up, scold

All of the people, hold up

Goodmorning, goodbye

I think I saw you last night,

Get out, die

Burrow, hide, fly

Away, why

Do we sit here and conspire in lies

Everybody puts in the effort,

We try, to make it out with our hearts intact

Alive, in the closet,

Cries, in the shadows

Lies, the secret to our future

Goodbyes, in the past

Hellos, whaddups, “Hi”s

Very much in the present,

I cast,

A spell on you

And maybe it’ll last

Goodnight, goodluck

It’d be best if we never touched

Whatever you work for, whatever you want          Aug 23, 2009

Whatever you’re saving, dropped

And fuck it, cause’ they call the cops

But at some point you decide it’s alright to get caught

Everything you looked for

All the shit you got

Put it on the line, everything you’ve ever sought

Look into the spotlight,

Wars like this were meant to be fought

Or at least that’s what I thought

Until the game flipped,

People running, people getting tripped

Take a drink, take a sip

You’ve been tricked, the shit is slick

I watch the candle burn, right down past the wick

Down to the bottom, let the remnants drip

Let the aftermath sit, shit

Watch the clock tick

Times slow,

Tables turned, I don’t even know where to go

Sun up, moon is full

Lighting the night, the unknown

The Big Show

I look left, right, darkness is cold

Wet my feet, life is so bold

Empty road, or at least I’m told

At some point this was going to be proposed

I assumed and realize I shouldn’t of supposed

You shouldn’t assume, car engine revs

They know, oh so no

Go, the beat runs like a freak show

Bass line turns sideways

I never thought I’d be feelin’ this in my day

What I’d lost, one year my way

Decisions are like mind play

And as much as I think I can’t help but think

Things were always falling like they say

And I lay down, and pray

And listen, and watch the fabric fray

And let the pieces surround me, and tell them to stay

Don’t go away

We’re free falling now, I don’t even know how

I don’t know what fucked up but

I just raise my eyebrow

I just look confused, I just know the knowledge

Of the premise of the news

He can be your muse, sick of being used

Look up in the daytime and you just look amused

Just the wire and the fuse

Waiting for it to blow up

I’ve just been abused

Walking away but then hold up

Should’ve never stopped

Should’ve never turned my head back after I walked

This was eight months of talk

A long time of watching myself throw balk after balk

A long period of time,

Where seconds minutes hours

Just transformed into a rhyme

And I sung the song in my head

Take the pistol out of the holster n’ shoot em’ til’ they’re dead

Sleep it off, in the bed

And think about forever ago and what the fuck she said

And what the fuck transpired and what the fuck I did

Or fuck this and fuck rap

But sooner or later we turn around and know that

We know maps, we know graphs

But none of us know how to track back

And smack flack

I know my own story, and some part always ends

Losing my partners or losing my friends

Coming to a close, following a trend

I just can’t stop, I just can’t bend

If we could all flex, if we could all send

Back all the actions we wish we never meant

But we did in the moment, and the moment is gone

I bend down to pick up and suddenly this song

Tried, battled, fought so long

Fought for success, this death has been prolonged

If we could all move, if we could all tend

To what’s important to us but turns out being the end

If we could all defy, if we could all bend

Over the barriers, than where would be truth and Godsend?

And miracles and I can’t fend

Off and on with all those trends

I just wanna make amends, I don’t want another end

What we are,         Aug 29, 2009

And what we ain’t

What I am on the thin ice I skate

Imbalanced, red white blue paint

Is faded, it’s faint

Listen as I try to acquiant you all with

These words, this rhyme, becomes faint

This melody, this beat, will make you shake

Wind picks up,

What’s that? Earthquake

I drop bombs first rate, if given the shot

Reel in the bait, the money,

Slide to the plate, the call?

Safe.

Safer than the police station makes donuts and cake

Been called phony, ridiculous, fake

Now come here apprentice for some calls to make

The desk, reality escapes

Surreal, the tapes, the cape

Superheroes don’t even know what this is gonna take

To bring a decision to a whole world debate

A fight, battle, to shake

The bugs off that don’t help

Too late, to wait

Gotta go now, gotta make my great escape

Turn my audience, or I wouldn’t have called

I wanna see your faces, shining out there bright and tall

I wanna see you get up after you fall

With a gun pressed against your head and a wall

Against your nose, it’s hard to make it one and all

And some don’t, I’ve seen it

I remember, appall

And I remember people crying and looking at them bawl

And dazed and internal brawls

Come together as one, don’t stall

Before another drops again, no one can take it

Come together as one and don’t let anyone crawl

Stand up high,

Because I don’t know what’ll happen if another one dies

The real life

No boats, superheroes, kites

The hard times, the strife

The pain sets, in and suddenly a mic

In my hand

Words,

I hope I can

I wish I am

I wish I was, I thought I fanned

Off them

Tambourines, jam, my man

Come here, we planned, escape

From the scans

I know Lil Wayne would call this a game,

But it’s the same thing, that drives me insane

Except it for live in shame

Put em’ down and let em’ fall in pain

That’s not my thing,

I don’t do disdain

I don’t pull from humanity or separate the mane

From the tiger, I like the open plain

The forest, the mundane

May seem boring until you look up and it’s in flames

And inside it our heart and veins

Everything we ever gave wanes

And suddenly effort disappears with no warning

God fogged the window panes

And the sky becomes our only eye,

But it’s fogged up by those that are still alive

And the ground slides

Magnification dives down,

The ocean now just a place to drown

White browned the people I pound found

Lying down and doin’ nothing astound

Me frowned upon but still insist they’re bound

To the mission, what I am

Is nothing but intuition, fate

Served on a platter,

eat it up because pretty soon it’ll be

Baked, flattened, staked

Watchin’ the image on the ground, what I’ve found

Is bound to my head, what I’ve seen

Her dead, don’t let it happen again and remember what I said

Stuck between reality,              Sept 9, 2009

And fantasy, takes over for me

Walls, for all to see

To stand atop, for all who free

Like birds and the bees

Create life and reality

Walking in the shoes of formality

For a second, abnormality

Becomes normal like the casualties

We’ve become accustomed to , salaries

All we live for, calories

Burned like the pages of a book that never ends

I enjoyed living with you people, you’re my friends

Time to leave, but it isn’t the end

Just the beginning of the bend in the road

A change in the trend

Like the big men moved boulders we will fend

We will continue, pushing like the pushers scam, and

Make a connection for the grand,

Lift up the above and the loud band slaps hands

High five lets go all together with the fans

With the man, with his pan

Frying the people, skying the band

Replying to the matrix with a free fall planned

Heating up, bustin’ out         Sept 12, 2009

Here to show what lynguistics is all about

Creatin’ rhymes in your head, cut throat bout

Round one, makes you shout

It’s about takin’ thoughts and letting them sprout

It’s about watering the seed and crushing pouts

It’s about makin’ it grow and not without

It’s about damn time you let me out

Communications seize the days

Without it we watch ourselves tick life away

We watch, we scarcely stay

We go away for winter and come back in May

Attracted to the warmth, afraid of plays

That mess with your head, and make the edges to our lives

Fray

And break apart

What is now was fated from the start

What is here is far from wrought

What is listened to is how I push my cart

And make em’ talk, and make em’ bark

And make the sweet turn tart

And make the animals run from the strongest of heart

What I see is what I live

What I do is inhabited by the nesting features of the crib

Of the faded edges of what I give

What I take, make, bridge

over, traded ribs

To protect a heart faded and braided and skated

Over the edges of countless fibs

Whoops, uh                  Sept 28, 2009

There goes social order

And everything that followed her to disort her

I’d like to say everyone went against the conformer

But it hopped out and ate my pennies and quarters

The borders

To sanity alleviating

I am scribbling fast with no chance of escaping

Or taking, breaking

Making myself, into another whole and a pile of wealth

The stealth you’ve shown

Makes you myself

Myself full grown and blown from the shelf

Because the shelf fell down, and took away the tombs

Of the groomed brooms who shroomed within vehicular doom

Boom goes the bomb,

There goes Iraq

The soldiers come in just to pick up the slack

Of the world cause they can and the rules gone wack

McDonald’s shuts down and there goes the back

To the world, and with it a full stomach of knowledge

Everyone finds out they didn’t get into college

And Harvard implodes for a second or two

Then it pops up again and shouts “We fooled you”

You fools, you tools, you mules

A laborer for strife

Breakin’ your spines for a vial of life

It’s not worth it, just go to your computer and Skype

And sit in your rooms all day with your wrist and your knife

Just kidding, right?

Schools overflowing with chemicals from the classrooms

Wastes from the bathrooms

Sucked up by powerful vacuums

While in the backrooms

The teachers make an evil plan

Against the students cause’ they just love the evil scam

They just wanna stick it to the man

By burning down the bridge

But the bridge is a hologram so instead they raid the fridge

Oh my, oh dear

Look what I’ve found

Scream all the mothers from a sold out crowd

And they hold it in the air, and begin to cry

A grimy bag of presidents and all their dirty lies

Forever is the weather               October 17, 2009

Cloudy tethers on sunny measures

I cannot blame what’s better

What’s worse

Infinitely small tags on an equally shrunk curse

The money in your purse comes undone

Outside the club big men with their guns

Cause’ violence is fun, and I like to run

From the police when it’s done

I like to have cuts on my feet cause’

They were bare, and we had to run through glass

Cause’ we were running from our lives becoming broken and smashed

Like shards bashed,

And bashed, and bashed, and smacked

In the face of trouble I’ll know who you are, how you act

Can cause white turned black

Reversal pact, opposite track

Going down the other road never seemed so wack

Cause’ rope between the both of use was always so intact

A ceiling shattered         Nov 9, 2009

Bringing us closer to dreams

The city’s scattered,

Plastered all over the screens

Motion pictures,

Sky’s close closer than it seemed

Door broke,

Choke and look as far as you mean

I mean business, gleened

Light wanes, money weened

Money spent on losing, not winning

Winnings a fiend

Of criminal mindset, spinning off the starlit balance beam

I fall, into the sky

Wonder why, wonder bread, wonder guy

Superhero superfly you and I

Touching lives

Overlapping explanations,

Passing lies

Over the internet spider web planet

By and by, firefly

Light up the night

Night’s gone, nice try

Daylight lights, lights mine

Finest dine, finest wine

In the town, the pueblo, the mountainside

The oceans dry, the deserts wet,

De-polarized, un-magnified

Intensified, fiberized, I like why questioning

Christening, blessed men

And women

And bidding, for an overpass

Bridges broke, horizon’s bright but overcast

Ominous glass

Breaks, above

One love, broke ass

Life passes by

In a video player mast

Ship, glove, driver seat

Driving to Nowhere Love

Move and groove and hug

The lovebug hugs

With drugs, it shoots and snubs the flame

A niche, a lie and thug

Criminal onslaught sought and bought

Intricate rug to wipe your feet on mug shot

Bloods, Crypts on morphine are sophisticated presences of love

And laughter and truth

The truth above

Moving away and stay for a while pray on the streets

One gun, one breath, a moment of

Omnipresent essence sentences in paragraphs present us with a photograph

Of Earth it’s dying now underground take a bow somehow

Now gone like a faded picture motion image

Take it way, take it away

Today

So here is your collateral,        Nov 21, 2009

Taking a sabbatical

From the imagineable, diabolical

Grammatical, terrible, inseperable

Diabolical and commendable

I missed you bendable

Dependable and incredible

Lights come down the corridor floor

Inside a barn burning and turning into more

Than I wanted to adore,

Turning more and more

Floor heating up it’s kind of warm

Being in the eye of the storm

It’s warm

Waiting dating mating

Life cycle of hating

Intricate minds escaping

Into a jungle of eloping and skating

On the ground it’s cold with faking

This beat is too much for bating

Fish I swallowed gating

The community I wished is waiting

Waiting

Sky is kind of dark

Looking for a spark

Ignite myself in thought

Immerse yourself in law

Abide by the law

Don’t ever think this hot thing will thaw

A hot thing, no more

A hot thing I adore

Or more, for better

The score is tied to the court floor

I’d die if it was looser or

More risky than before

This feeling grows more and more and more

To the store to buy a door

Maybe privacy will come and store itself

Behind the door

Birds are gone it’s winter time

Time for those winter rhymes

My previous winter blinds

Were shut to happy times

Filled with angry crimes

Against the human mind

Against sanity it’s line

Is thinner than it is fine

I look to slow down time

Along this line

Explosion overload

Falling I lost the code

Just step into my humble abode

We’ll stay forever in the frozen mode

Hold up, it growed

Or grown but already stowed

Underneath it’s waiting cold

The snow is overblown

I blew it to make it home

A place where I can roam

It’s home

Life inside an hourglass

Moves fast

Or faster than it did in the past

Watching time tick back and forth

And back, mesmerized before you get  a smack

To the crotch and reality seeps back into your path

Sand drops down into crack

Again and says it’s back

Drying out skin

On the back of the pack

It’s wack

Holed up in a cave

Waiting for my own grave

Just kidding it’s not paved

Just in the process of being made

I see you but it’s gone

I waited for so long

He’s waiting for his song,

Go on, go on, go on

Threesomes at a time

Get your mind of the gutter it’s a rhyme

I plan on doing time

With my friends it will be fine

The finest of oldest wine

From Cali and behind

The wall I am so blind

How did I not catch it in time

Time is on rewind

The hour glass comes from mine

Own thoughts caught and grind

It out on top of limes

Drink it down

The limes

Mouth is gaping

Blessings, taking

In the process of making did I already say it ?

Making

Breaking down

The cried about clown pulled down

Eyelids and frowns

Honking around, bringing the mountain

To the ground

Burning them bridges down

Burying what I’ve found

I like you stick around

It was funny when we unwound

Sometimes it’s not bad to come unwound

Underground

Keeping it solid is much harder than it seems

You see the laser beams come down

Over me, over it, overseas

There is a war

There is a war? What for?

I don’t know but it’s a war

Frozen peas on the broken bones

Of calamity

To bring down the swelling of prosperity

It’s killing me, it’s hurting you

It’s stinging me

Memories are back

Opening the shack of my mind

It’s black then it’s light

In stride I catch my mind

My breath, it’s gone

Is a sign of all my wasted time

I’m giving it to you,

Once again, clear your mind

I swear to god I’m fine

Stop asking like a mime

Don’t hear you just see a blind

Man, woops he spilled his drink

He was blind

Watch me go in circles

I’ll turn your gold face purple

Silver will go to Hercules

Status it tickles hurdles

I love those hurdles

Adversity cursing me

Cursing you, hurting we

Distracting people and attacking people

Antagonizing and making havoc

We go up, up, up and then come down

I go what, what, what don’t make a sound

She goes from, from, from no one around

He came down, down, down

Let me in the sound

Everything is soaked up to maximum dramatics

I am emphatic for all of the people picking up slack

It just goes back and back

And comes down the track

Cheering to go fast

It goes fast

This is getting long it’s a long song

It’s the words of the herd

Life is for guessing and messing up

And saying the absurd

Like “Who’s on third?”

Who really cares but it gave itself some fame

This seems like it’s on a board but I can assure you it’s not a game

It’s on paper and it’s real and it’s going to form a lane

With some legitimate numbers and I’m going to live there forever

Brains, picked

So lame, whipped

For accuracy, mamed

Hit, stick, hissy fit

Throw me into the pit

See if those lions can even touch this

MC Hammer touch this

Intensity grows and I know I’m going into the zone

Pictures around his head fade

In the dome of the kinds

Of people he finds when he roams

He roams?

Yeah all of us roam around the obstacle

Cones provide barriers on the course

Atone for all of your sins

A moan in the distance

Has only grown

Double take, wow we’ve grown

And blown up really big

Way bigger than when we were kids

Where has the time gone

While I was fishing in my midst

All the “to dos” turned into “already dids”

All the blank books flip open their pages            December 14, 2009

To the Texicano border people making minimum wages

For minimal work,

is painless

My reputation is stainless

And that face makes it painless

This gorgeous place is disdainless

I want to make it

The pulpy pulpit gets a flurry

Turn my head to the woman and the woman to jury

What’s your story?

Like kid what’s your story?

Ma’am I’d tell you but rest assured it could get quite boring

Paragraph one, the old judge’s already snoring

And outside the weathers raging to stormy brook is just roaring

With glory

Hurry hurry, before the flurry flurry

Of snowflakes then the tears will make my vision blurry

I like you girly, girly I really like you’re swag

Your personality is gorgeous wanna put it in a bag

Take it with me like a dog and make my tail wag

Droopy emotions seep through the floors but there isn’t a rag

That could wipe up this emotion

Is a feeling can’t be tagged

Pay attention to the road, these words will go absurd    Dec 23, 2009

Adverb sounds reverb remorse is on the curb

Cartoon bubble blurb murmurs heard

Through the wall cracked tile vile to all oh look a bird

Flying by, wild beasts in heards

Now the dangerous ignored until we understand

No, we understood

Minority dark street head covered a hood

The greater good, the less we should, would

I took, I stood, I watched,

No blood, I’m hurt and I could

Fight back but the slack on the rope would come back

On a faster track

This is not quickness this is longer distance

Total wack

Signs back, rock that stays in place

Solidity from contact, a contract

I like that, I like you, I want that

Stay there, fun fact

This is the word       Dec 24, 2009

For all ya’ll that haven’t heard

This the thing everyone wants to hear to be near

Wants to be heard this is the bird this is the herd

Follow it this is the nerd the knowledge the

Line between clarity blurred, I’m scarred

Calming cat purred, word, word, word,

This is the word

The beginning is the near the end is behind

Follow the line to the end stop on a dime

Tears pouring from the convicts eyes this is the site of the crime

The divide between greatness and average this is line

Stop sign, I don’t mind, I walk by blind

Cause’ if I’m lookin’ up there’s a chance I may rewind

Back to the past psycho state of my mind

Goes crazy, grind gone hazy

I am for real sky just hates him,

and hates me the world goes mazey

To find the word

This is a preview for everything that is to come     Dec 27, 2009

Big boy comes over and asks who’s won

How am I supposed to know?

I didn’t even hear the gun, when it went off

I was busy trying to have some fun

Then I realized that shit was done, hardcore now

Don’t miss that bead of sweat on your eyebrow

Can’t show it, curtains closing now, take a bow

That scent is fowl, coming from the bowel

Of the planet, threw in the towel

Take it back, hear the howl

In the distance when the moon’s out, growl

Back, don’t take that

Pick up your slack, break your back

Trying to get there, to that success

Has created such a mess

A fucking winner love fest

Sweaty pit to get it

Let me get this thought off my chest,

It’s been sitting for a while

You won’t ever be able to contest

Get your head out of denial

Sun’s set, raining out                      Jan 4, 2010

He’s outside feeling fly

Pressed against his chest

Beautiful wet mess and he’s a lucky guy

Yeah he tries, tries to fly

Look at those eyes and you’ll see why

My interpretation of the situation is a little vacant

Because I don’t know what to make of it

Lust and love come up from high above

And whisper in your hear, loud so all can hear

Take a mirror and look real quick

It’s moments like these, in tragedy

We look for some peace

When solace may be the only remedy

And now her hair is wet, I tremble when I think back

Butterflies were set, then they went free and gave me a smack

To the heart, from the start

What I regard as the start, may be apart

From the public but now it’s dark

And he looks her in the eye,

Her eye is closed they’re exposed

Take a snapshot and jam the camera closed

So no one knows

But in moments just like this

When life buckles your hips, and you take a hit

Think about those lips, think about that kiss

Roll it in your fist, reminisce

There’s always time, to take time from your mind

Kindergarten made high school a breeze

Social anarchy

was not the barricade for me

Recess year one, little girl we had fun

Best friend at the time,

We think about it now cause’ we’ve always been

just fine

Second grade was a clown

Lookin’ at it now that teacher flips

upside down

Until I’m looking at the ground

And the ground is above

Take a snapshot cause’ that clouds full of love

From fifth grade,

And yeah we ran the school

And yeah some of those people would now say

they were a fool

And I guess that’s friendships then

Friendships now tended to take a swing

When we came around a bend

Like into middle school

Sixth grade, seventh grade

Cool

Is not the same cool, I guess it’s more like

tool

But they were good years, and I roll them in a fist

For all the times I was happy, excited, and pissed

I reminisce, because I know there’s time

There’s never a shortage of time to take off your mind

I think past that, those facts

And I lose my tactics, my paper and plastics

After that all that just becomes a blur

I think about a person, gone

And I remember just me and her

I think about a friend

From the beginning to the end

And I realize there was never a reason to pretend,

I refuse amends

I think about a sky turned purple

One day and made me hurdle

As I watched my days come full circle

In tears, then I think about cheers

And the colors change again

Then I think about my fears and become aware

Sometimes I just pretend

That I know, because I know about the past

When I think about the future I generally end up

In an hourglass

Of memories, just to take a peak inside

And trip and stumble to a place where I can’t hide

And I try to be snide,

When I fall I sometimes lose my pride, thrown aside

And then a beat drops, and even though I don’t really have a voice

I speak into a mic and “Yes” becomes the only choice

I put aside the diss and I speak my mind,

Look up and laugh at the bell and open

Up the machine gun lines

I reminisce from time to time,

There’s always time to take time off your mind

Light becomes a whirlpool and

where will it go?

When will all the water in the dam overflow?

No one knows

And from this I suppose we compose our future woes

To all the hoes, to all the bros, you fools,

you crow, just let it go

I don’t want to be a hypocrite

And spit on the shit

That I always said was gonna fit

But that’s it, and what I’m trying to say

I can’t tell you about tomorrow but I

can summarize today

Actions speak louder than words

yet it never ceases to amaze me that verbs

Can be the difference between a house and a curb

Stay reserved, but don’t miss your turn

Random words and wagons and

Moments come down

From the shelf where I put them

when everything was unwound

And now looking back I guess I learned some stuff

I guess looking back there was some smooth and

some rough

And at points I was weak,

And at some points tough

I lean in and pucker my lips

Remember it so I can never miss this

I reminisce, cause’ there’s always time

There’s always time to take time off your mind

Sad isn’t it?           Jan 18, 2010

Claim one thing throw a fit,

Toss em’ in a pit

Let the dogs come in,

And that’s it

Throw the dogs in at em’ and show em’ wit

Cause they can eat shit, right?

Grind it out with intelligence and grit

That’s life, take a hit

For all the hits you take I’m waiting for a fit

Fastball in the mit and I swear to god

I swore I’d quit

If it got to this, if I got this pissed

If I got this dissed if I swung and missed

If we come and go like tides in a fight

I know I’m right, right?

White noise pollution ensues

The people suing blues

Turn to bruises when the punch was thrown

I took a break and took a cruise

Through the woods I learned the news

Opinions changed when I saw the truth

When I watched booth move out from the wall

And I looked straight up at the fall

And said damn that’s tall, how far can I crawl?

When quick sand comes and doors close down the hall

Shut out,

Like the civil rights movement

Be prudent in order to be a student

To get in, get a move on to the union

Just make sure you don’t do this

Too stupid

Rule one             Feb 21, 2010

When the fun’s all done

Make sure there’s still room for you

Rule two

When you’re wide awake

Listen to the night come free

Rule three

When you get the door

Don’t stop, don’t look for more

Just leave

Rule four

Never check the score

Until you’re across the line

And make sure everything’s fine

And never dive

Rule five

Don’t blend the tides

Or everything will stick

Rule six

Stay away from cliques

Don’t make stupid picks

Try to end up in heaven

Rule seven

A wedding is a serious debate

A divorce requires serious hate

When the bills are all paid make sure to look what you made

Don’t jump out the gate

Rule eight

Stay divine

If the wine’s poisoned don’t drink the wine

Rule nine

Stay classy stay fine

It doesn’t matter if it’s a chicken or a hen

All you need is some paper and a pen

Rule ten

Remember the rhyme

If you break the rules make sure

That you’re picking the right time

She’s got a lot of people missing her       Feb 25, 2010

Tryin’ to kiss her slowly

Tryin’ to make their ends meet boldly

She’s got a lot of nerve to be so absurd

To give any weight to the words she speaks

She’s got a lot to pretend

Pretend friends in the end

Melt away coldly

And I slowly speak,

Because my tongues tied again

I slowly eat

Cause’ your stomachs so full

So full of it, so full of zen

Let it out

Got something to shout let it out

Just let it out now

She’s a dumb itch

An annoying prick that keeps biting at your brain

A stupid habit that’ll drive you insane

A worthless head game

Untameable, now interchangeable with

Words I can’t even name them all

Free fall, into a dark hole

That ends in a big wall

Smash into it

Before I lose it and throw a fit

There is a little tea cup that spins underground            March 1, 2010

For most of us on land it doesn’t make a sound

Until you take your ear, and you put it to the floor

And the buzzing rushes to your head and you beg it for more

There’s a man at the entrance,

and he runs the ride

And he says “Little boy come take a look inside”

And you walk over, and the outer shell spins

And turns into a fish before you catch it, it swims

Then the rollercoaster in the theme park passes

You ride it to the end into a tub of molasses

And stay there, because it’s hard to move

In the light above the fruits of fate ensue

Look at you

Boy you’re up against a wall

Stand tall boy, if you don’t you’re gonna fall

And be smart girl

Always hold your net high

When your man comes around you better catch that guy

I turn around to a desk where my pad and paper lies

The documents to my future

I cross the “t’s” and dot the “i’s”

And I think about it as I do it

God damn, time flies

Higher and higher and higher goodbye

Goodbye

Don’t ask me why, I’m leaving

My legs and my arms have been bleeding

From the way you’ve been treating me

From the way she was beating and beating articulately

And carnivorously too

She’s the girl they always said would eat human stew

He’s the boy I always heard was really cute and funny

He’s the boy that’s gonna make all the money

Rumors are runny

Time ticks to the beat of my tactics

I wish that I could switch between human flesh and plastics

It’d be so much easier, my god, fantastic

Good god, forgive me, I’m so, sarcastic

Escaping rose and who knows where it’ll go

Who knows when the damn will overflow?

I do

I know that when the stablity goes it’ll hose our structure

I know the stabilities gone cause’ it’s all so much dumber

Than it used to seem

Never seen such a bummer

Potential that dried out in the heat of the summer

I looked out at the ocean

And I saw a floating desk

There was a pad on the oak and a pen in the pocket of my chest

And I signed off my life

Stuck a sail on the wood and journeyed to what was right

The desk sunk, stranded on a beach

Sea shells, all over, but which one should I keep?

In a dream, they said, just take any shell

Turns out a shell can ring your heart like a bell

Well I jumped off that thing and I hit a brick wall

Flashbacks to a prophecy of an arduous fall

Swim under, swim over, it was too tall and deep

Images of a ledge too steep to leap

So I crawl, through the sand, underground with the cup

Find gold and treasures what do they do with this stuff?

Mirrors and fog rise down from above

And look up and thank you for this love

Sky, fall              April 18, 2010

Steeped in blueness take it all

Graffiti on the wall read it

Call my friends make it crawl

Speed it up and start a brawl

Still it bawls and I worry about the walls falling

As I’m rolled inside pissed and appalled

At your fingers pointing like it was your fault

Those dirty fingers move to the handle on the vault

I told you never to never touch, stall

Until I freeze and think and write all over—

This time its all hulls and halls

And at the end of the hall a stall to stand

Sitting with a man and he tells me to take it slow

And let it go

Take it slow, take it slow

Take it slow before the world spins and you grow old

Take it slow, take it slow

Take it slow before those thoughts in that head of yours

Overflow

He said,

Take it slow, take it slow

As you go along and

Never forget your song, he said

never forget your song

And I just sat back and watched

The moving hands on the clock

Praying for a pause and waiting for my doc

At the bus stop

Which was at the top of a mountain

With a glock cocked

Shooting at the rocks falling down off the block

I was chipping away at the mountain moved a little

And I dropped my feelings, the bell hop

Came into my lobby and I tried to stop him again

He said listen to me you’re my friend,

In my head I’m going, “This is the end”

Go to the beach, the bell hop says

And a shark comes and as I’m trying to fend off

All their questions a man in a scuba suit appears and

Mentions my past

With a hull and a hall to walk through on a raft

Look at your past, stuck inside an hour glass

Take it slow, take it slow

Take it slow before the world spins and you grow old

Take it slow, take it slow

Take it slow before those thoughts in that head of yours

Overflow

He said,

Take it slow, take it slow

As you go along and

Never forget your song, he said

never forget your song

A beautiful face

Stuck inside a jar so I race

To the starting line with a megaphone saying

Pick up the face

With a mirror as I chase

And I look at my reflection and I hardly can see my face

Cause’ it’s changed in this case

I’m thinking about all the time gone to waste

And try to embrace what I’ve learned

But it’s fake

And the only thing real are these words that I make

So I keep putting them together

And string up a song

But the song falls apart because I got it all wrong

Because the emotions all moved, they don’t last very long

And all that I thought I now think is prolonged

Overused, anticlimatic and gone

In the past, of the grass

That I cut in the back but the front is still long

In the middle of the patch of grass a man

Banging a gong

Saying come over and hear this endearing rhythm

And then he throws a bomb

Pick up his hand and written on his palm,

Is a lifestyle in a song,

it says before you move on:

Take it slow, take it slow

Take it slow before the world spins and you grow old

Take it slow, take it slow

Take it slow before those thoughts in that head of yours

Overflow

He said,

Take it slow, take it slow

As you go along and

Never forget your song, he said

never forget your song

Sitting in water

Cumulative tears

I said where you been man?

I’ve been waiting for years

At the bottom of the crying ocean I found

All the words I’ve spoken strung out on the ground

And I dug into the sand,

And gritted my teeth

“Let them go,” he said

That’s all that I preach

One year is             June 26, 2010

Fear

Okay so things are changing      July 8, 2010

Opened my eyes up to the aging just yesterday

Rearranging the arrangement of everything

It’s crazy mindplay

Beating hearts seem to be day to day

Every way I’ve ever been talked to

I gotta say

It’s been a variety, playing with their prey

It’s been okay in the end I’ve got to say

Every way I’ve been treated

You could lay down one hundred and one different plays

There’s been a girl, a guy, a whirlwind

Of different people an assortment

Some gorgeous, some porous

Mostly porous with holes in their umbilical cords

Their swords are

Selfish, girls with mental health issues

I guess they can’t help it,

Self indulgent but they seem to enjoy it

It helps them

Get through every day it makes them line up some enjoyment

Making guys cry, my oh my

If I could tell you otherwise

Some lines would die

Inspiration for otherwise

Messing with your head and invitations to her bed

And it all floods back, one year later

One year since she was dead in my head

The undead back to life

Back in my eyes and my brain is taking a swipe

At this sanity becomes insanity

It’s a thin line between maintaining and

Disorganizing, planning

So much planning, fanning the heat

Keeping this heart beat

Eliminating the wheel squeak

Keeping the message machine’s beep

“Hello, I was just calling to say sorry”

Good golly miss jolly I wish you’d

Let me into this party

One year ago,

When the train left the tracks

And left in a poof of smoke

The last of the smokes pack

Empty, uncertain, untrue

I seriously looked for other answers

But it was honestly you

So aloof, so lost, nothing at all

In one department and then I looked out and discovered the mall

And don’t you even dare come through

I looked for other answers but it was honestly you

The truth hurts sometimes         July 27, 2010

But it could be worse

It’s like pawning for change in an empty purse

I

Look for answers, but am followed by a curse

Sympathy wasn’t interested in you,

Time didn’t solve anything for me

And we always said it’d be funny

But the sun is setting, I’m still hungry

I want my money

It’s not funny anymore

Behind closed doors

I’m so sure I know what you do

It doesn’t phase me anymore

Behind closed doors

I’m so sure, I’m so torn

Between two paths

Stuck inside an idle hourglass

Crossed feelings,

Broken laughs, shared dreams

Looking back I talk so much smack

It’s a cover-up for the trap I dove into

Like an idiot, my fault, my bad

I take it back?

Fuck that.

Go away get out

So bad, so sad,

The fallout

“We’re dead”

1 a.m. too late I’m asleep in my bed

You’re head fills up his dreams

Commencing sequence

That red button gleams

Press it and see everything you mean

To see

All the things, your wedding ring

Beckoning

Burning, ending so early

Girly, girly, tell me your story

Please come visit

Don’t forget about me

When all you see

Is so shiny,

and new

New planet, age, weight, function      August 25, 2010

A manic, disfuntional pandemic

What I thought I could’ve planned

I couldn’t plan it

Overwhelming thoughts to manage

Words in my hands

Slip through and hit the granite

New age, another page

Weightless words branded

By my brains hand, has handed

Me paper, in my head, flying words landed

In ink, I can’t stand it

And what I can’t stand I manage

Major damage, hostage in my home campus

This is not Atlantis

I am not lost, not underwater but definitely panicked

A good panic, a good nervous, endless baggage

Picked up every second every day, full canvas

A broken bandage with a healed wound I can manage

I can cram it, I can remember,

Slam it on my ear

Weights on my words slip along and disappear

Happiness to loneliness

Complacency to fear

Change epidemics come and sweep all my peers

Up into a wave, you can enter here

You can exit there, take the wheel and steer

The highways all yours from the city to the pier

Live motion ocean, the water is a mirror

On the sun, on your face you better run

The bubbles gonna clear

You’ll be exposed, who knows?

New beginning cheers

New planet, campus, canvas

Shift your body into gear

Got a cute neighbor (back home) a real saver

A keepsake while I seek out my major

Greenlea is my favorite flavor

I’d really love to hate her

Try to write it out on paper, but later

I hope I’ll never have to chase her

And Carolina won’t take her

I find myself confused about the creator

And where it all comes from

And sit back and watch,

And always have fun

With or without you it’s hard to do            August 29, 2010

Close my eyes, walk and come to

My senses, everything I said was true

Yes I miss you, I’d never diss you

So many things to get through

Everything is so new

Let me know when I should take my cue

And leave, I kept my heart there

Just stole a few pieces

This game is not about the purchases

It’s all about the leases

It’s all about the thesis

Take me where you need it

But if you need me forever I’m gonna have to keep it

No problems with that, I mean it

Empty my head and then fill in the creases

My nerve decreases, this is absurd

The teacher teaches his lesson

And peaces,

And time sets me between it’s limits and reaches

Time puts me between two witches         Sept 2, 2010

Temptation and riches

Gotta make a decision about business

I revise and compromise

And change my revisions

Making time for other time

I sit back and wonder why, then

Realize at times you’ve got to burn bridges

Statistics show, my bitches

Glow in my mind, as I meet the road

I will travel down, blind

To gold, the river I’ll row in hopes of finding

Flow, in hopes of being dope

I’ll mention my stitches

Injuries I’ve come back from and ridden

The tide almost to success and bitten

Predetermined winnings, gritted it out

Spitted the language I know

Hitted the pit, slithered off kindred

Spirits I love you we’ve lived it

Separated we’re different but always close

Pitted, set in stone, created

A low drone

Vibrations for me to follow

Tour guide clones to follow home

Where exactly do I go to go back blown

Dry, I’m gone then back again

I roam, he’s wasted, he’s stoned

I’m cool, I’m calm

As we travel along

You, me, my friends, beating the gong

To our songs, one song

One laugh, let’s go

About the throngs of this land with one thought

Never forget where you’re from

I belong, and where I’ve gone

It’s taking me I can’t be wrong

It may be long, but when it’s done

It’ll feel short

I promise I’ll be back

It’s a promise to her, it’s a matter of fact

It’s a statement intact in the back of our minds

Jacked up in a lit up sign,

I replay and rewind infinite times

Gonna remember this all

Rubbing this lifestyle raw

They say kiss for closure            Sep 22, 2010

Now just trying to gain my composure

Affection has me blowing around helplessly

Over and over, overboard I told her

Love doesn’t die just growing older

Aging it’s amazing it’s not colder

Getting warmer and warmer,

Bolder and bolder

Future potential hits the molder

Now it’s molding, and forming

Boulders we will move

Scalding feeling

We will groove

We will not stop dancing

We will choose

To do what we want

And in the process remember not

to lose what we could’ve forgot

I peruse through the memories

And jot down the lines

I assume that whatever is not

Will end with time

But it doesn’t stop

In fact the distance is fine

It’s painful but it’s like love is mine

This feeling’s divine

And the tides come in

Water swallows us whole

There’s an entire ocean waiting

But I still feel your pull

We go down.

The blue swallowing my soul

In the distance that silhouette

Is beaming and I can’t take my eyes

Off the goal

But the goal becomes lost in the pull

And the pull becomes stronger

The bull underwater

Is pushing me harder

I tried to disguise her

This is wholly desire

And the ocean is lost in the fire

Pictures              Oct 2, 2010

Frozen images

Of the distant

Now enhance the distance

ATL now I’ll see you at Christmas

Memories in pixels

Each frame is like a separate flame

Firing whistles off in my brain

Missing the Lane but continuing

To embrace change

I miss her, I miss her, I miss her

Someone explain to me

Why the motions in my head don’t go lame

When all will be the same

Will be the same, will not have changed, will be engrained

Like in that picture frame

Like in that movie when they kissed in the rain

Make it rain

Memories

We were never Facebook friends             Oct 4, 2010

And in the end I wonder if I was one of the men

She came home to and said

“Mom, forget them.”

She probably said nothing

If I could’ve done anything then

I would have

All of her friends

All of her family, all the surrounding trends

Spoke the truth:

The end, as unpleasant as it was

There were so many signals

I don’t mean to degrade with my pen

But I’m being torn apart by yours

I swear to God when I can

I’ll do what I can

How can you virtually

Expend all of those things

People spend time thinking it seems

Like you can’t even mean what you say

It’s like a dream, or something

It’s not okay

She’s got no idea what the reverberations

In this head say

Every day in every way

They’ll probably never go away

Your daughter’s here

and she’s here to stay

At night sometimes I lay awake

I may have made a mistake

All these thoughts that I take

I leave them inside

I wouldn’t want to break

What her mom has built up

And put a stake through her truth

That’s so fake

But it seems you’ve made a mistake

The instability was clear

All the vulnerability that girl had to bear

No I never thought it would come to where

It did, and there it was afterward

So where do we go from here?

Hair on my arms still stands up, I care

No I don’t know what you feel but in

the end we still breath the same air

How dare you say that

It’s not fair to the people around you

All those people who have surrounded you

And supported you not drowned you

In the past, have patience

Don’t throw them under the hour glass bus

They’ll come, it’s not fast I know it’s not fun

Don’t be an ass, look how far you’ve come

I’m speechless, the past has been hung

Please don’t criticize the watching eyes

We want to come but also just want to be wise

Your bloggings are overssized

I just want to do what is right

And know that no one has said goodbye

Lets loosen up the tone                Feb 8, 2011

Old photos we’ve grown

Since we were little

Who would’ve known that some things happened

Like they did

Full blown surprises hid behind corners

No fibs, live and let live

I did

Most of the time, who could I kid

It’s impossible to do that, all of the time

Sometimes hearts pounding itself out of my ribs

Dibs on that one,

The black one

Called racist so I rename it the fat one

Called an ass by the woman who just

Bashed the underclass

Let it pass, foot off the gas

Slow down and think back

One, two, three years ago

Think of that

Where were you? Where were we?

Just lost my favorite hat

On a bike ride

The Lock baby, in the woods, no map

Imagination

We sat there forever

Amazed at the little path of woods

I could’ve sat there for days

Eventually had to go home

As is the way when you’re little

Time slips away slower sometimes, sometimes faster

So easily swayed, such passion

Such an open mind which crafted

Ideas now I couldn’t ever imagine

Haphazardly sliding along this pageant

We call our future hasn’t happened

We want it to happen then step back

And question if that was magic

Or did time really slip away from us

And the cash in our pocket’s gone

In the third grade you were mac’n it

Now on the alter slappin’

A kiss and a ring and attaching

A barricade to those woods

Now they’re miles away

Sometimes you want to grow up but sometimes

I just wanna stay

Young, betrayed by the principles

That were laid by whomever

And whatever came first

Times gripped me now I’m it’s slave

Pushing and plowing along

Lake of the woods we were catching some rays

We were saying she’s just a babe

We were planning that trip to Las Veg’

I’m not saying that life isn’t good

Just want to go back

And maybe just for a minute

Lay right on top of that bike jump

Ride it back and lose that hat again

And come inside, nothing in that head

No worries of tomorrow and nothing that I said

That I shouldn’t have said

Come back ten years wiser

Go as far to say maybe return to the pacifier

Grow up again and change very few things

Just remain a kid for a little longer

Maintain that steady right side of the brain

Which has been stained

Numbers, letters, headers

Gotta make them right

Got to make it better

Be better be whatever just don’t mess up

I loved being lucky and I loved relying on luck

Age is a ghost in time               Feb 16, 2011

Every time you rhyme it disappears

And reappears to be judged by scum

Slime that we don’t need here

Grime that grinds the gears on the machine

People so blind they think they’re seeing clear

Minds so stupid they think they can steer

Toward destiny then turn like a deer in headlights

Mirrored with themselves staring into eyes

So full of fear, overflowing with desire

To peer around the corner and cheat as long as

They’re near safety

Queer in the slang sense

Stupid in reality

The mentality of a donkey

Heads are set on the salary

Serious about life

But humorous about the calories ingested

By a woman who died of obesity

Mentality of criminals

Appearance of frutality

Amongst men who believe that the

Brutality of slavery was justified

As long as it was managed right

As long as it wasn’t me

As long as you yourself is free

As long as me myself indeed

Is he doing what I think he is?

Golf ball of the  tee hole in one

Trilogy your story is going to be

Legendary

Be what you want to be

You’ve got the monetary means

Spending spree now it’s you and me

What happens when you’re facing your worst enemy

Someone knows your tricks

Yes indeed

Yes you can’t proceed

And you will be tried with speed

And you won’t make it from your seat

All these branches off this tree

Four separate eras                     April 13, 2011

Of experience, change, chains

On the mental state of oneself

that happen apart but eventually end up entangled

The photographs stain the latter part of the brain

And eventually shake hands

and make eye contact.

The first of four

One rebirth of beginnings

A time to revise but we were young

Too young to realize perhaps,

What was ahead

The walls so much higher than before

Creating chaos in the adolescent brain

One bitch dressed in

Popular apparel

Freckled, crooked, hiding the naïve

Nasty grin, an obese petite

Which during one

One may find attractive

One, much like a highway

Lights, speed, and empty sound

Dreams in hallways

Growing but not knowing

What exactly one is learning

Melting along

One melts into two

Two was the grown up

Phased out, climbed the ladder

To the top and then looked up and went

Damn, so far to go when

You thought you were getting

To the finish and then the black cats

Came and crossed my path

And what could I do

I just followed them

Two was distraction

Two was my reaction to things that

Had been building up

Potential is interesting

It’s always there but not

Always used

Gave a dog my bones

Ended up elastic

Three was nights in the dark

People asleep sharks but I didn’t care because

I was aware of reality now

Vision flickered on

Off, on, off

Numbers, girls, sleep, repeat

Three was bitches ain’t shit but

Hoes and tricks

Three was it

Four came with a bridge

To cross

From the third to the fourth

Jumping through a hoop of fire

Fire from suicide, confusion, aspirations

Delusion from seeing so much at once

Thinking I was seeing everything

As a whole without hesitation

I took my life

I flipped it about seventy degrees backwards

And I put it down

And then I crossed the bridge to four and

Realized that I needed to flip that life

Seventy degrees forwards again

It was like taking kaleidoscope vision

Smashing the kaleidoscope so that

All the shards of a whole you’d

Been seeing went away and became one

Again.

Do you remember?                  April 29, 2011

Do you remember that August?

That was the hardest part of it

Standing on the rocks

She didn’t wanna be bothered by it

The talk that I wanted to talk

Walked out to the water

Farther and farther we got

The tears flowed harder, like the

Salt water all around us

Explained “Blank, we’re growing farther and farther…

Apart.” As much as I don’t wanna bother you

With another thing, I know all of these things

That bring themselves around with you,

You are the problem king

Or Queen or thing, either way it’s gonna sting

“Just say it, just say it”

She says as I replay it,

Foggy picture montage, I chose to delay it

One week later on the phone, “Blank I love you”

Chaotic, stoic, archaic mistake now

Hit ball out of the park

In terms of know how

I didn’t know how loud I’d blown out

Spinning around off the road and losing my control

When you’re young don’t underestimate a woman’s gravitational pull

One should take a bite, I ate the whole thing

Pulled out into the ring

That thing that I was fighting was real

Flash back, do you remember February

Just a high school dance

I’d just realized how scary a thing I’d dodged

There was no romance

Just a bullet I half-dodged

But that night the second half turned around and came back

She said “Let me teach me how to dance”

I didn’t want none of that

“Blank, do you remember what you said?”

“No, Blank, what?”

“The love council has ended”

And she turned and ran, never came back

Just shouted from her window some nasty shit that

Turned my mind around, that was a wrap

Until she kept coming back, and back, and back,

And back, “Why can’t we be friends?”

And I had that question answered again, and again, and again

Real men stand tall

And I did that for about a half an hour of that phone call

Listened to me being pushed around

And thought that real men didn’t just lay on the ground

And interrupted, and said the words that I’d found

Buried that whole year, just surfaced up from the ground

Call lost, world spiraled down

Over-dramatic, perhaps, but my thoughts so loud

Tears now, from that ocean I found returned

Thanking you from a distance for showing me how

To live

Lost in my thoughts, sit back and rewind          Nov 5, 2011

Super hero powers but you can’t read time

It’s like the lime, tequila, margarita,

All mine, college life so fine

But lacking something so genuinely divine

Repetition of the blind leading the blind

When we all think we can see

The mind leading the mind

Is a dangerous thing,

And yours, and hers, and mine

There is this thin line holding together this–

This bind, this link, inexplicable things we think

The grind, the holds, as the brain unwinds

And I see it all, and recline into a style

So fine, so quality, so surreal that you question

Letters, and numbers as signs of something

Fake, and all we do is take, and take, and take

And sometimes all I do is

Fake, and fake,

A lifestyle dried, baked, waxed

Sealed wrapped as I wake to you

And her, a mistake or reality?

Tallies kept on a board in a basement room

Fatalities and births and shit to make us right

Gloom and doom and crimes swept up

With a broom like this life which just zooms

Flashes, booms, 3 months?

Soon. Not long. Soon.

Held in and wrapped up tight

Sent into the sky toward that light

The darkness which awakens me in spite

Of the fact that it’s so soothing, so erratic

It’s so bright, and in this period when I, and her, and we

Are blooming, I question what is right,

The future is looming.

And I know it’s sooner than later, careening

And spooning in the heart it is gloomy

But in reality is probably less like this

And I know it and you challenge these things

So sue me, fire me or auto-tune me

But it will not change things, I will not bend like your roomie

Lost in thoughts it seems

Sometimes we dream

Lost in dreams these things become real

Parallels to our actual lives

These themes blend into other things

And this line, this thin line of the divine

Separating time from time

Disappears

In our fears we find courage and

In our minds we find switches to steer

And in life peers

Criminals, scholars, dealers

We find mirrors, and within these mirrors

Reflections of tears, of smiles, of things that jeer

The very things untouchable directing us toward

The gears in our head, and in the bed solitude

Is gained and desires fed

Distracting us, you, her, and me

From what is alive and what is dead

Where we will strive and where we shall skid

And in my head,

Loops connect strings which dream things

Hopeful thoughts mingling, combining

With fear and happiness and strength

And weaknesses singing

And though it’s fake,

Though I know when I wake I will wake

And there will be no dreams

And there will be headache

It’s real. So real that

we must question what is unreal

And what is truth

What is spoof? Aloof

I wander and in the day I ponder

I wonder I wander what is true

No longer, becomes true in the past

And like all of time I end up where I began

Living life out inside an hour glass

If there are no feelings         Mar 11, 2012

Then why do you care?

They say as I stare at the tattered photo

Pushed against the wall over there

And it’s silent

And the truth is I’m scared

The decisions been made but I stand

Unsure and unprepared.

Treated me like shit

She’s said so long

Selfish and fickle and she says

She’s been strung along

Admitted and fallen

Apologies like a constantly beating gong

In the background of what’s become

A sad, sad song

Uncertainty hurts me inside

I abide by my instinct

But can’t help but deny

The fifty/fifty feeling that I’m lying

And that these feelings inside I’ve denied

Are the truth, that I still love her

And these are just means to an end

For some proof.

Then the picture, like standing in a mirror

Two years ago except now I’m not pictured

Her smile is wide and

I know I can’t create this mixture

Of stances, but mich you’re standing with him

And I can’t help but feeling

This pit in my stomach this scripture

Seems wrong, the beat of the gong

This fucked up song

I type up a letter that’s ten pages long

it’d go on and on

But to send it’d be wrong

So I sit at the window

Press refresh til it’s gone

Tears are never out here

But I care, not supposed to

But these red flags are glaring

It’s a burden I’ve been bearing

She’d never understand,

She doesn’t, just sitting miles away preparing

While I seem like an ass

Only drawn in by red herrings

These words are those tears

Here’s your proof of me caring

And if it never works out

I’m sorry, just know that it’s tearing me apart,

too.

This confusing abyss         March 23, 2012

Head in the clouds

I sound crazy now

But honestly things are sorting themselves out

Circles of doubt circle my

Brow, sweating out loud

As I verbally bow to the

Situation, I am an idiot and this is my dissertation

Bad decision after bad decision

Zero elation, thoughtful constipation

Talking about hours and hours

Of confusion no sensation

Started out, day one so certain

Day two I start to think

My head it is burning

My heart it is yearning,

Rational takes control

I can’t fix this now

because now she needs time

To sort out the confusion

I’ve sent to her skull

The lull continues

Lull after lull after lull

And my issues

Spiral in and out of control

And my tissues

Pile and pile at the door

That’s dramatic,

But I’m acting like an addict

In denial, except my addiction

Is not pills, no prescription

Miracle drug kitchen, I’m searching

As she listens

To contradiction, after contradiction,

And the friction, between us grows

And the words appear on paper

I wish that she knew what I know

But I know, no one knows.

This feeling,          April 13, 2012

This sinking feeling

Pull, pull, push

I’m reeling, and she says

Jealousy will be killing me

And she lays on the breaks

Because she should be healing

And meanwhile she says he says

She says, this onion, is unpeeling

Layer by layer the picture unfolds

Dusty photos without meaning

Wait had meaning, and now in reality

I’m dreaming, brain overload head

Steaming, drama king, but really.

Opening and closing doors

Too simultaneous to ignore anymore

The lore of another fling

What’s in store will probably mean

Everything, what’s out the door

Will end up interesting

My interest is amazing

And this life it is aging

Quicker and quicker tiring

Of playing this game

Yes this is my name.

Yes I am not insane.

Yes I do have a brain,

Lame is the feeling my main

Goal is healing those feelings

All the while my feelings

Are peeling, motivation is disappearing

Defeat closing in and sealing me

Within its grasp

Tap tap on the shoulder

This is the gap close it

Thought I was dreaming

Turns out that nap was a bitch

Lap dancing a miracle drug

In front of me then I woke up

Like a slap in the crotch

Like the time on my watch

Sensitivity lost, dumfounded

By the capabilities of loss

And what is not yet lost.

My boss is my head,

But when your head’s in your ass

You sit down below and

Wait for the time to pass.